My worst loss
Hi I’m a first time poster.. I am here because 2yrs ago I tragically and unexpectedly lost my 20yr old son in a hit and run.. no driver has been discovered to date.. I’ve slowly recovered from this loss and just became more clear headed.. however I’ve had set back.. on Friday I had put my Furbaby to sleep she helped me through many difficult times especially the loss of my son..
im scared that I’ll end up back at the beginning of my grief process with all raw emotions that are unbearable.. please feel free to post songs, quotes or anything that may help pick me up.. I don’t wanna spiral into the dark grief hole again
@ghettosmurf
I'm really sorry to hear about the immense loss you've experienced over the past two years. Losing a child in such a tragic and sudden manner is an unimaginable pain, and the grief process can indeed be incredibly challenging. It's also completely understandable that losing your furry companion, who provided you with comfort during difficult times, has brought up new waves of grief and sadness.
We are here to offer support, and I want to commend you for reaching out and seeking ways to cope and heal, including coming here. I suggest you that you continue coming, and also explore other supportive activities and spaces that 7 Cups offers to help you cope.
Grief is a unique and individual journey, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. It's okay to have setbacks and moments of intense emotions; they are a part of the healing process. What's important is that you recognize your feelings and take steps to care for yourself during these difficult times.
Some music I can recommend:
"I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan: This song is a heartfelt tribute to cherished memories and the enduring love we hold for those we've lost.
"Fix You" by Coldplay: It offers a message of hope and support, reminding us that we can find strength even in our darkest moments.
"Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen: This song's lyrics often resonate with those who are grieving, offering a complex but beautiful perspective on life's struggles.
"You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban: A song about finding strength and support from the people and memories that uplift us.
"Lean On Me" by Bill Withers: This song reminds us of the importance of leaning on others for support during tough times.
"Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole: This rendition is gentle and uplifting, and it can provide a sense of hope.
A few Quotes to think about (you will find many more posted in our Forum):
"Grief never ends, but it changes. It's a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith. It is the price of love."
"The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not 'get over' the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal, and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but, you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to." - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross & David Kessler
"Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life's search for love and wisdom." - Rumi
"Strength doesn't come from what you can do; it comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn't." - Rikki Rogers
Some recommendations
Self-Care and Support:
- Browse the Forums of this Community, where you will find many inspirational posts by people who have gone through similar situations as yours. Answer some of them, so you feel part of this Community. Never isolate yourself.
- Practice self-compassion and self-care. Be gentle with yourself, and allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come up without judgment.
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Surround yourself with friends and family who understand and support you during this challenging time.
Honor the Memory of your Son:
Create a memorial or keepsake in honor of your son. This could be a scrapbook, a memorial garden, or a special tribute in your home.
Share stories and memories about your son with loved ones to keep their legacies alive. You are invited to write those stories in our Forum.
Grieving is not a linear process, and setbacks are a part of it. It's okay to feel the pain and grief, but it's also important to reach out for help and support when needed. You've already shown great strength by seeking ways to cope and move forward. Keep taking those small steps, and don't hesitate to reach out whenever you need to talk or seek guidance. Come here to share your emotions whenever you feel like
Your journey is unique, and this Community is here to support you every step of the way.
This kind of loss is unbearable, especially when the driver has not been found. My parents knew a couple from church, that also lost their son through a hit-and-run, this was nearly a decade ago. The husband has now slowly came out of the grieving, but the wife is still very saddened and you could see that she lost that life/spark in her eyes.
So, take your time to grieve for your son. It's okay that it becomes a roller coaster ride with your grieving. There will always be good days and bad days.
There is a song by Hilary Duff, from an old movie "Raise Your Voice". In the movie, it was a song she wrote in memory of her brother, when she survived a car accident and the brother didn't. You might be able to find it on YouTube. Stay strong, we'll be here if you need to vent.
