I still don't know how to feel.

It's been a while since I've been on here. I just am still at a loss for words I guess. I still haven't let go of my mom (2018), uncle (2020), and now my aunt (2023). Cancer really sucks and heart failure. Right now I really need all them back. I graduate college this up coming May and they won't be there to see me walk. I'm going through things with my boyfriend too and I'm scared to lose the cat we just got. The cat has been making sure I've been ok by following me everywhere, sleeping with me when I'm at the house, and more. I don't know how to handle things right now. I know it's been year with my mom and my uncle, but I just...I just...don't know how to feel. I just want to rewind time and either cure cancer or show them what is going to happen.