Why am I scared, I don't think I recognise myself when I'm feeling healthy..

Idk what the eticut is on here and this is my first time posting a new thread. There also isn't a spell check thats not great for me aha.

I had a mental day time and it I upset my partner during it, but they forgave me and understood and they dont gold it against me.

But it was a wake up call. I haven't been taking my mentle health seriously. I had such intense self louthing bad self worth for a few days. It was so out of control and I didn't value my feeling in order it address it and it got out of hand.

I found some clarity and motivation. And my heads calmed down.

Now I feel like I've come down from some kind of high, or I've leveled out. From Thhe bad to the sad and now clarity. I'm scared I'm going to lose that clarity. I don't know who I am anymore when I feel clear and OK, like I do now! It's scary. I'm so used to being anxoise and procrastinating and low self worth. I'm scared of what it's like in my own head when I have some kind of drive.

I'm scared I don't recognise me like this. Im used to seeing my self as ill and weak and a burden and expecting things to be hard.

What if I get better. What if I find peace and clarity and drive again and self value. Why is that scary?

Has anyome got any idea why I'm scared of what feels like a good mentle shift? And how to sooth myself, cos I have butterfly's and I'm so scared, it's like I'm a differant person and I dont recognise myself.