You are not Alone.
I write poetry when I am inspired or when I just need to get emotions out of my system. This poem "Alone in the Night" was written about the cycle in and out of depression that I have experienced. Right now I am doing great! I thought it might resonate with some of you. I want you to know that you are not alone in your experience. Your feelings are valid. Thee is hope though. You can change your thoughts.
Alone
Not enough for anyone
Drifting in and out of belonging
Trying to get close
Desperately wanting to add value to people's lives
Swallowing my feelings
Trying to stay positive
Listening, supporting encouraging
Drained
Dismissed
Devalued
Worthless
Why am I alive?
What am I doing here on earth?
Would I actually be missed if I died?
My death would be tragic
But I give and I give and I give and I give
There’s nothing left
Am I making a difference?
Does it matter?
What does it matter that I try my best?
What does it matter that I have been patient and kind?
What does it matter that I am a supportive and encouraging and positive friend?
I don't actually make anyone feel any better.
I don’t make a difference.
But maybe one day I will
Crawl out of the depression whole
One step at a time
Shower
Comfortable clothes
Cry until theres nothing left
Sleep blessed sleep
Talk to my therapist and start medication
Make a plan
Unpack the trama of my past
Process the wounds so I can
Heal
Finding
Myself
Self Confidence
Self Love
Authority
Boundaries
Healing
Surrounding myself
With people who lift me up
Who care for me
Who will fall down into the whole with me
People who are empathetic
Healed in relationship
I value myself
I make my voice heard
I am worthy
That little girl was worthy
She deserved more
Once again I have gone through the cycle
Once again I have found myself transformed
Maybe this time the good feeling will last longer
Maybe this time it will be permanent
Maybe I will never feel so
Alone
@neverendingRainbow489
This is definitely comforting. I think everyone has felt a bit alone at least once. So, It’s always comforting to hear that we are indeed not alone. I really like the transition in the middle from feeling a bit pessimistic to optimistic. Thanks for sharing!💜
@neverendingRainbow489
I like the way you described it as a cycle. I have chronic depression and have adapted to the churn by getting used to starting over from scratch. Jobs, finances, relationships, etc. In a way, it's become a virtue, and has helped me cultivate flexibility and what the Buddhists might call non-attachment.
I am relatively stable these days, too. Things I wrote when I was feeling wise are precious for me, because they give me perspective on how much I've improved my wellness, and are a testament to my persistence. Thank you for sharing yours.
@orangeTree959
* Things I wrote when I was feeling worse