I've been trying to learn how to disconnect my feelings from people.
I've been trying to learn how to disconnect my feelings from people. I kid you not, I have spent over half of my life seeking connection with people, and now I feel it is time for me to learn to accept that I can not connect with people. So I need to learn how to disconnect my emotions from people, because people tend to just hurt me.
@tryingtosurvive2024 aww sweetie 🙁 that's really sad to hear😥 hugs you tightly ❤ please remember, it takes all different kinds of people from all walks of life to make this world such a special place. You are part of that ❤ not everyone wants to hurt you, there are good people out there ❤
@Tinywhisper11 Firstly I'm not disconnecting from anyone that is being kind to me on 7Cups. You are one of those people! But I'm scared of where things are heading in real life. Currently the people at work are not friendly at all. I'm walking on eggshells, when they are around. When they are not around I'm living in loneliness. There are a few that are not as bad as the majority. But I can not get very close to those people either. It seems that they are also trying to protect themselves at work. Maybe protect themselves from me??? All I know is things are feeling really really strange.
I don't know how to explain this. Way back in 2019 I had to study something just cause I wanted to make friends. It lead me into a weird place but I felt free enough to let it go. Which I did, and move onto something I felt was more important, and I stayed in that study for a long time.
In 2024 I felt that I needed to do another study. I did not realize that what I was studying was going to loop back around to what I was studying in 2019. Now thing have gotten even stranger. I just met a guy at work, who is connected to all of this!
He's been kind so far, but yet I can tell He's bought into the views that the research tells me is dangerous.
I've been thinking about how weird my life has been... Really all I want is a "normal" life. Something that is stable, and happy most of the time. Instead I seem to keep getting more weird, and more weird, and more weird. Every time this happens, it makes more and more glad that I have stable parents to live with. Cause if I didn't have them in my life, I don't think I would survive all of this! Yes I am lucky, but it is not a happy kind of lucky.
I'm so glad and thankful for you and that you have good caretakers in your life now. 🤗
Hi there. I am not sure of what to do in the situation you are in.
However, as for disconnecting with people, I guess I can provide some inputs. Here disconnecting that I am referring to is- " We are having connections (genuine or not so genuine) however your happiness isn't dependent on them. Our key to happiness is not to be given to them.
We continue having connections, but we also have this knowledge in mind, that ultimately we are humans and imperfect souls. Our emotions and temperament change from time to time. Therefore, we can become like this- I keep the knowledge in my mind that, no matter who I am connected to, they can leave me/ cheat me / disappear / hate me or anything. However, It doesn't matter to me. All I am concerned is being a good person. I respect and am grateful for the connections, however at the same time I know that all are humans...therefore I will leave the expectation that they will be with me always.
2nd part: How to stay contented even when alone.
One of the ways is- Listening to your inner voice. Connect to your inner self and also connect with God. The more you listen to yourself the more you will know about yourself.
As for wierdness, You are not wierd at all my friend. Its just a mental concept that you are believing on. Everyone is unique...therefore don't think that you are wierd. You are a valuable person.
Thank you.
@SoulwithGoals that's very wise ❤❤ and so true ❤
@SoulwithGoals My problem only problem with this is the concept of selfishness. Like, somehow you look out for number 1, and you make yourself happy. When you have connections, you also need to put in an effort into the other person. I can't balance.
Yes you can put in effort to other person, however you just stop expecting that the other person puts in efforts. You consider both the options.
(Idk if I understood your qn correctly though)
@tryingtosurvive2024 I'm not sure what to say🙁 I understand how over time connections we make with others can hurt us, break our trust make us feel so lonely and lost🙁 I guess at what point do you just stop trying🙁 it's a sad reality. But just know I'm here for you ❤hugs you tightly ❤
@Tinywhisper11 I think 7cups is a place to discuss this stuff. I've had all kinds of trouble with people. I couldn't begin to tell anyone how many times I had to start all over from scratch. I feel old, and tired.
@tryingtosurvive2024
@Tinywhisper11 I think if there was a hug competition, you would win 1st place. 😊
@tryingtosurvive2024 😁😁 yaaaay! ❤❤
@Tinywhisper11 You will be known as the blue ribbon girl. 😊
Incan totally relate that because that was something me too during my early years most of the time as I didn't had proper emotional stage or support. Right now I am also on a similar journey sometimes gives anxiety but I am managing it with breathing or break time alone. 💫🍀😅
I have same feelings...
I have same feelings...
@tryingtosurvive2024 I get that. My struggle is disconnecting my feelings in general. At work, at home, anywhere. I work in construction, feelings have zero bearing on my job, yet they cloud my judgement on the daily. If you figure out how to turn it off please share. Thoughts and support your way.
@tryingtosurvive2024
Is it that you've been trying to connect with people who you seek approval from? I've found, being a "people pleaser" all my life, that I am habitually attracted to people who I would like to be approved of. It took me a long time and work to realize what I was seeking, and to realize that the reason I never got it was because I was seeking out the wrong sort of people. There are "types" out there (more than there should be) that are simply looking out for people like us to suck the life out of. Don't give up on other people completely, just be more cautious about the ones you pick and choose. :) <3
@askquestions1 You can only try with people that are in your life, right?
Recognizing your own thoughts, feelings, and needs is crucial. Connections with others can enrich our lives, but not at the expense of our own well-being.Separating others' opinions, emotions, or expectations from your own identity is indeed a valuable skill. It allows you to stay grounded, focused, and true to yourself.Your words resonate with self-care and mindfulness principles. Keep prioritizing your inner self!
I feel similar. I'm done making efforts to fit in. I never get acceptance. I'm always "the other". It's been years and years and now I don't try. Isolation is also hard. But I derive my happiness from setting goals and going about achieving them. Friendships aren't on my list of goals anymore. If it's to come in my destiny it'll be through a divine miracle - I dont have the heart to try and find more disappointments.
@tryingtosurvive2024 Hi, as we grow older, we lose some friends and possibly gain some friends which is a normal process as situations and thinking change all the time. Therefore, do not feel guilty about it. Nowadays you can do a lot of things alone like exercise, travel, walking and connecting various social or religious groups.
@TrueMind I can't do those things either.