I don't want to be a mom anymore

@CallMeRachel4

I’m still a teen and I can’t say I relate at all to being a mother, however form someone who’s mother never chose to work on herself or acknowledge their was an issue in her life and rather took that out on me I can’t stress enough how good your doing. You’re trying your best to get better and I can see you care. You’re a good mom, and I can’t thank you enough for doing this for him and for yourself. 

@CallMeRachel4    hi. I'm just jumping into your story. Im assuming Chris is your baby boy and that you've got a case of the baby blues. I need to tell you something. ik you know you love your son. I know you feel like you don't though. because I haven't had any kids yet myself (planning on it in a few years maybe!)  I have no idea how hard it is to be a "loving mother" I've always assumed its been easy to love your child. I know sometimes you grow disappointed, and I know in some cases parents don't like their children yet still love them (this is disregarding broken homes with shat parents) 

this is gonna sound crazy but you need to force yourself to love your son though. despite not having the opportunity to have any kids of my own yet,  I do know what its like to really care about someone and barely tolerate them at the same time. I think you are tired of caring for your son. I get it. it IS tiring. you are justified to feel that. but sometimes you just have to force the emotions out of you. babies can pick up on that you know? because when your not doing your absolute best for them, even babies, toddlers can see that. and later on it can cause self blamage issues. 

I'm not saying your a bad mom. I'm glad your finding time for yourself. keep finding help and work through this. your son needs you to :)