How are you guys ?
"Fine" or if you are in a mood to be civil "Fine , you?" You are not supposed to say "I am hurting and I cry myself to sleep these days. And oh yes, I haven't had any real conversation with people since a long time , so please stay and talk to me because I don't want to be alone anymore , please" , RIGHT?
The question is 'how are you" , not "how you you want to be" !!
" I wish you could here the word that I am too afraid to say" that's the honest voice being talkative.
"Our stories are not meant for everyone. Hearing them is a privilege, and we should always ask ourselves this before we share: “Who has earned the right to hear my story"
The Gifts of Imperfection
No-one may really solve our problem . But some may come with a promise to stay with us in it , only if we give them a chance
@Perfectlyimperfect87464 I love how you think!! I'm in the same mental space right now. Don't know if it's because I'm neurodivergent or if it's what everyone feels...but these type of conversations feel dishonest or dismissive, though often it's because people can't or won't take the time to understand and listen to each other. I hear you - it's maddeningly lonely. I have trauma and a lot of times other people can't relate or just want to solve it for me and quickly get the uncomfortable conversation over with. It's true though, the person who should hear my story - that's a rare person. I hope I can help them too. The reason they can relate is because they've been through it and/or they are absolutely amazing and good souls. I'm so grateful they are out there.
@ClayGiraffe,
Not sure if I it's polite to feel happy that you could relate. But I am. I don't know if everyone shares my POV either. But I find many civil conversation a little fake. I guess it's because people don't really share anything genuine there . And when I feel like to say something real, I become the odd one out? And yeah half of the people who actually takes out time to hear me out wants to wrap it up very fast . Maybe because they are actually incapable of helping me out. But it definitely hurts when they back off. And yeah loneliness loves to make an appearance at such moments . Some truly amazing people does hang out . They own my adoration. And people who share similar experience? Well I can't be happy about their state. But I know I can definitely relax around them. I am greatful for both of them. I am sorry if it's offending to ask this, but are you a listener here? You give out some strong listner vibes
@Perfectlyimperfect87464 thanks for your response! I understand what you're saying. I know it's healing to meet people who can relate...and that can give a happy feeling for sure! I'm glad it makes you feel happy. I might look into being a listener, thanks for the thought!
@ClayGiraffe ,
Please don't feel thankful for my response. It was my pleasure. And it's good to know that you get what I mean. I didn't suggest you to be a listener , it's a cool idea though. If you like it go for it. 😄😄😄
Honestly I would prefer if someone is just honest when I ask how are they instead of just saying "Fine". I mean that's the point of being anonymous here, to let go of how we interact in real world due to fear of judgement. Honesty from the start sets the tone for the whole conversation onwards
@dancingEnergy1321,
Yeah I truly agree with you on that. It's more beneficial when we are open. Being anonymous helps a lot. But most of us are simply programmed to be diplomatic at the start of a conversation. I won't say it's wrong. It's indeed a good manners. But such Norma makes it difficult to express ourselves when we actually need some assistance in life
@Perfectlyimperfect87464
I'm doing alright. Had a lot of anxiety so I'm trying to use my support system and dbt skills to manage them. Getting back into 7cups but not sure I'm ready to listen yet due being burnout from last fall. I'm enjoying everything else so far.
@BeautifulApple2496,
Thank you for sharing how things have been for you. It good to know that your support system is helping you get back to your normal self. You mentioned that you were burn out earlier. That's not fair. I am getting an impression that you have been a listener here before that. Please be aware that irrespective of what the went wrong before , you are a good person. The mere fact that you have been here for all of us leaves no doubt about it. It's okay if you aren't able to take listners. I haven't talked to you, but your presence here made people happy . All of them will be equally happy to know that you are working on yourself . Take care.
@Perfectlyimperfect87464
im doing really well! tysm for asking this i've been really upset for the last couple days but im doing better today! also anyone who needs some suport this is for you
YOU are beautiful! YOU are amazing! YOU are doing your best! YOU are trying! YOU are worthy! YOU are loved by the 7 cups family! YOU are loved by me!
@NoahAnimates
Thank you so much for your kind words. All of us need to be reminded about what a wonderful person we are , not just about our cons. I am happy that you are feeling better. Hope things turn out to be even more good for you. Just know that even if things decide to spiral , we will handle it. You are also not alone . When they try to knock you down , just look back and acknowledge that their success rate so far have been 0%.
@Perfectlyimperfect87464,
For the i-dont-know-how-many th time today I wondered what an amazing person you are. I talked you you today aiming to be an understanding listener, but you blowed my mind. In a span of such a short time, you managed to be one of the people I most adore , how did you do that ? I wish you could see what an amazing person you are. Everytime you showed me who you are, I saw what I would aspire to be one day . Thank you for talking to me. Thank you so much for these words. Yeah we deserve let out our emotions the way it is. Raw real sugar free and brave , these words are really a blam on our battle wounds. Now tell me why doesn't that suprise be anymore ?
@JustHumanThatsNotPerfect, Stefan "calm down , take two deep breaths say I like myself do it again" 😸 I think you need it after this message. Seriously , I didn't know you can type this long. I wanted to be the essay queen among both of us!!!😢 you are definitely exaggerating😋. I know I am adorable and great but I am not that great. But really, Thank you for saying so. It helps to go through my obstacles when someone validates the struggle. You have done an excellent job on that btw. I can't thank you enough for that you know? But neither do I want to, because I am not thaaaat greatful to polish your ego. Thanks for coming around though it looks like you are stalking me 🤣🤣
@Perfectlyimperfect87464,you can still be the essay queen buddy , that's not my cup of tea. And I was not exaggerating, I don't like to polish ego's either. But even if you didn't do so , I feel flattered. Tysm. Happy to know that my words was a little useful to you. And I wasn't exactly stalking, did notice your notice name, but I bombarded your thread with my essay (which is underated in my opinion) because those were true in most of our RL situation. I understand that it's difficult at cups to. But I am happy that you are trying. That's what I do too. So I will say it's a bright step in the best direction.
@JustHumanThatsNotPerfect, @JustHumanThatsNotPerfect, i am sincerely sorry that it has become underated.😞 Alli could do was upvote it even if I strongly believe you were exaggerating. 😁 I wouldn't say it's the best step in the best direction, again , another exaggeration, you might as well take exaggeration down to a PHD level. But thank you dude. PS I upvoted this reply of yours😂
@Perfectlyimperfect87464 I agree, but I think the anonymity of 7 Cups makes it the perfect place to be entirely honest with the Listeners. No one will judge anything you say because we're all here for the same reasons; either to find someone to talk to or to listen to someone who wants to talk. The one thing that binds us all together as people is our ability to connect emotionally if we put our trust into someone.
@PeacefulDreamer0606, thank you of your understanding compassion, you are indeed a good person. Your presence here will definitely help many .It's good to know how good people at cups are . And yes, animosity helps a lot for many of us. That's one of the greatest pros cups have.
However even though our identity isn't revealed, as a member, I will say that I am still putting myself out there vulnerable when I say how things have been for me . Why ? 1)It's easy because whatever happen, it won't effect our real life. But if things go bad , it will surely effect our mental health. And I do know there are beautiful souls out there who will understand. But you and I both know there are people who come here and become listners to make themselves feel self worthy. They might also be undeage and lie about it when they sign up . I won't say they aren't kind. But people like them is likely to do more damage than help . When I am hanging on a thread to my sanity, I can't go and open up all at once to someone whom I don't know even a little bit. Did you know there are people who block me when I just state I had to go through SA? Or in the middle while I tell them my experience, without even taking their leave ? IHow will that feel? I know it's overwhelming but it's important to atleast take their leave. I am not talking about all . I have met a person who took out Extra time out of there own schedule to get me to a better spot. There is a person who came here with just one message when he was in a movie theater. I owe them . But just because of that none of us can say all will be descent. There are listners who like to flirt . Again not all . Just very few .2) After being judged for what we say all our life so far , it's difficult to believe people won't judge you. Deep down I know they might not all be the same. I adore such good souls who come here to sincerely be there for us . It's just difficult to trust that they won't belittle our issues. I won't say it on the listner