Don’t feel good enough

I feel like I am stuck in a loop of not feeling good enough. My parents don’t talk to me as much ever since I moved out. I feel like my relationship with my boyfriend has gotten worse and I don’t feel like I have any friends now I am living a new life. I feel so alone and like I am having to comfort everyone around me and not get anything back. I try to hint when I want comfort because asking directly makes it feel fake. I don’t understand why even though I ask about people all day making sure they are happy I don’t feel like I get that back. I feel like nobody really cares that much about me and if I disappeared nobody would notice. I’m scared of being alone and I don’t feel like I have any worth and I just want someone to ask if I am ok for once. I feel like I am upset so much that I just become annoying and clingy and then people like me less and don’t want to talk to me as much. And then I get worse because nobody is asking how I am. I feel like I am trapped in this loop and I don’t have the courage to tell anyone because when I have before I have been shot down and called selfish.