BADLY NEED OF ADVICE
It has been six years since I have ghosted people who were once very close to me. When I started college, it only took two years before I started to do it again, but this time to my block mates. There is nothing wrong with them, and I have no problem with them, but sometimes I cannot control how I feel. Suddenly, I would feel down and distance myself from everyone. I would not feel like talking or being with anyone, and it would continue for a few weeks until I couldn't be with them anymore. Even if I feel fine, I just can't get myself to talk to them or even reply to their messages. It's just embarrassing to approach them again when I've gone cold on them. I know it's not fair to them, and I want to talk to them, but I just can't seem to bring myself to do it.
When I'm relaxed, I sometimes get overwhelmed by a sudden wave of unease or anxiety. It feels as though anyone could set me off, and I'm on edge waiting for someone to make a wrong move. Even the smallest mistake can trigger a strong emotional response from me, and I feel like I'm about to snap. It's been happening more frequently lately, and I'm unsure how to cope with it. Maybe I need to seek help from a doctor or a mental health professional to get better. However, I'm worried about the cost and the stigma associated with seeking help, and I'm not sure how to navigate the system.
going to therapy or consulting a doctor is expensive, and the healthcare system in my country is poor.
@mededicatedstudent
hi there, just swinging by to give this a bump for you for others to chime in! i hope you get the answers you need!
Hi, if its possible maybe u can get employment so u can afford therapy, that would be a good start to deal with your anxiety, and possible underlying causes of anger. All the best
@mededicatedstudent
So essentially you have some sort social anxiety based on your high-trigger hypersensitivity to being hurt in some way or form. Hence your withdrawal from them makes to feel safe as well as saves them from your snapping. Then you feel shy saying hi.
Have you looked into your nature? :: Are you an Introvert? nothing wrong with that. Most people are extroverts and derive their esteem from external validation (not just ppl) by being out there. Introverts derive their 'juice' by focussing inwards, and are not interested in external bustles. You need to be clear if you primarily an Introvert. If yes, then Own it. It's your beautiful nature.
Then you can moderate your social participation based on your terms, including avoiding anxious scenarios or just staying quiet in a shaded corner.
About Ghosting people.....truth most people today have their own lives. From nowhere an old buddy or even once met sales man will phone and say hi. If they can do that, so can you, except you be genuine to check on how they are and if all is good with them.
Next your emotional anxiety: Why is it so? Reflect and write it in a personal journal or discuss it with a listener etc. That way you can navigate it better and manage yourself as it comes,
Hello mede. I can relate to some of the things you say and if it is okay, I would like to speak to the parts that I can relate with. You mentioned more than once about your old friends and you feel bad to have left them and you would like to see them again. I suggest doing just that. Almost like an 18 yr old leaving home for the first time only to return shortly from the big city for the comfort and warmth of family and friends. In all honesty that speaks directly to my circumstances. I was that 18 year old trying to stretch my wings only to miss things like the comforts of a warm sunshiney day. I returned 6 months later finding work at a local restaurant eager to cook comfort food and serve it to my friends and fellow citizens. I felt proud that they seemed to genuinely like my food. I'm truly glad I humbled myself and returned. When I did very little had changed and I was glad. Even a starving man will eat baby food if it nourishes. I enrolled in the local community college and I plan to study hard and to tell you the truth I still enjoy a comic book. 😎 Nerd herd unite. What was my hurry to grow up anyway. Cliche-ville, stop and smell the roses.🍋 This has been a long rambling way of saying here's a big ole quackin hug for you🤗🤣❤️.
@mededicatedstudent
Hey👋,
I can relate to many of the things you mentioned and in my case I know it's because of disorders that cause me to cut off people and not socialize.
I hope you are able to get the support and guidance you need to overcome this. Take one step at a time, and never hesitate to reach out for help.❤️
