A Seventeen Year Old with Dementia

I've always held the belief that dementia is one of the most cruel diseases out there. In the early stages, one begins to feel something isn't right, like waking up and forgetting where you are, losing your memories and eventually your entire identity. It's sickening, if one dies naturally without dementia, they'll at least die with their memories, and can die at peace knowing they lived a life full of love. But for dementia patients, they are confused, lost, and scared up until that last moment. It's horrifying.

Last year I was dating this girl (we'd been together for over a year prior), and on January 28, 2022 we were taking the bus to school one morning and she felt nauseous, so I walked her to the restroom and went back and forth to the nurses office until the nurse arrived and then I walked her there, hugged and kissed her cheek and told her I loved her. She disappeared then, for 22 hours. The next morning, I awoke at 5 am from a nightmare and she happened to text me before I went back to sleep. She had suffered a brain hemorrhage at age 16, was having brain surgery and wanted to tell me she loved me if she never woke up. All I recall from that day is screaming and sobbing on my floor asking why her? After 6 months of surgeries and then ongoing radiation treatments, it is unlikely she will suffer another hemorrhage at this point.

But, the damage has been done. Our relationship didn't last past August for unrelated reasons, and we stopped talking around November. Just recently we got back into contact and I can't talk to her without crying. She'll still sound like herself, but she will ask the same question within 5 minutes and act surprised at the same answer she received only a few minutes ago. She can not write anymore, and she has been diagnosed with MCI and is currently being evaluated to see if the MCI is rapidly progressing into dementia. Essentially, there is no hope. There is no cure, she will have to suffer a terrifying series of final years, and likely pass away in her early to mid twenties. The sweet girl I cherished with my whole being is barely recognizable today, and her parents encouraging her to drink and smoke weed to cope has not been helping slow the progression either. My heart breaks every time she asks me something again, because only a year ago I swore up and down she was the sharpest girl I'd ever met. Now, she suffers from severe PTSD and MDD as a result of the traumatic experience and seems miserable constantly.

You never think it'll happen to someone you love until it does. She was 1 in 100,000. Please, tell your loved ones how much they mean to you while you can because forever is promised to none.