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Literally lonely

convivialTangerine8704 December 18th, 2023
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I’m trying so hard to make connections. I know myself, and without work over the weekend there’s no response when I reach out, no contact or connections, and I go days without anyone talking to me.

if I were to put my problems up on a wall I would take them back every time, but geez why is this getting to be so hard?

6
EyeoftheElephant December 23rd, 2023
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I came here tonighr,because I too feel lonely.

Perhaps we can share something about ourselves here to help each other. Worth a try, I guess.

I had no friends growing up. My identical twin and I played together - which was enough. Before I was a teenager, I did not feel lonely because I could go and feed young elephants by merely walking a few minutes from my parebts house .

I grew up with wild animals in Africa. Just walking outside was an adventure, becauase the chances of being chased by hippo's, or lions, or leopards or buffalo, was at times an every day reality. Every day could ve an adventure, merely to avoud being hurt or killed by some wild animal.

In my mid 20's I experienced loneliness again.

I will turn 50 in a few months. I still do not have friends. Too much focused on work, and no social life.


My one friend lives far away... in Africa. I live in the USA for almost a decade now. I should make much more of an effort to make friends.

Maybe..sharing this here will have some meaning. Maybe the safe, mundane existence in the USA (which I really do appreciate!) contributes to my sense of loneliness?


Your thoughts?

wittyBlueberry2891 December 23rd, 2023
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Interesting story--growing up with elephants in your backyard!!  I am sorry for your situation and the long-term pain it has put you in.  I am praying for you as i type.

i too am going through terrible loneliness.  What i am experiencing is called "pathological loneliness".  I just learned what it was this week.  Apparently, it is formed when you have an especially bad dysfunctional relationship with a malignant narcissist, you develop what is known as a trauma bond.  I am currently going through a divorce that is actually killing me.  I hate he for all the horrible things she did to me, but at the same time love her desperately and addictively because of this trauma bond.  It is like cult brainwashing or Stockholm syndrome.  the pain it produces actually is physically painful -- like what PTSD survivors experience.


thanks for letting me share.  

EyeoftheElephant December 23rd, 2023
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It is good to share to process feelings and emotions.


Having experience with loneliness, divorce and PTSD, the road - the journey - is a familiar one. Divorce reveals a lot - as much about oneself as about the nature of one ex.


It gets better, the hardship, and much sooner than expected. It really does! What is impirtant is to really take care of your health. Megnesium, vutamin C and D, snd B12, excercise,clean water and plenty of fresh oxygen. It makes a big isitive difference in how you feel.


in addition - for men going through a divorce - maybe listening to audio books (or reading the hardcopies) like "The Unplugged Alpha" by Rich Cooper, or "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi, may help.



wittyBlueberry2891 December 23rd, 2023
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@EyeoftheElephant

thanks for the suggestions. I will get the books tomorrow.


  I just got back from going out for dinner sole -- met some people at the restaurant to talk with.  it was such a wonderful experience.  I guess forcing yourself to get out there is half the battle.  great people are available out there we just need to seize on it.  Merry Christmas!


wittyBlueberry2891 December 24th, 2023
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@EyeoftheElephant

HI again-


Came across this song about loneliness.  Pretty true lyrics and a good tune!!

https://youtu.be/r1XamG4uQYE 

image_1703377012.png

EyeoftheElephant December 26th, 2023
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That is a good song. Full of energy. Thanks for sharing..

Do whatever helps to increase your mental and physcal energy. Music. Exercise. Nutrients. Conversations with people.


Tangy Tangerine is one of the best supplements. It helps to get the correct vitamins and minerals.

See:

Youngevity Beyond Tangy Tangerine 2.0 Multi-Vitamin & Mineral Complex

see: https://a.co/d/i7TTUYl

on Amazon.


You can get it as tablets or in powder form. When you go through a divorce or relationship breakup, you have to take care of the chemical balance in your body. Magnesium and prebiotics and probiotics are essentail to help maintain a pisitive mood. Tangy Tangerine has it all.


Another tip: when you drink water that contains high amounts of copper in it, it will make you depressed. So, avoid copper intake Increase magnesium and vitamin C. I mean natural Vitamin C, and preferably the lyposomal kind that releases vitamin C over long periods into your body. Not the sythentic vitamin C nonsense.


Yes, Tangy Tangerine is vety expensive, but I know not of any better alternative. It is a high quality product. Take it at least twice or three times per week. (My unqualified/unprofessional advice - merely sharing from personal experience and input received from medical professionals about supplements). You need to determine the amounts and frequency of supplements that works for you. Vitamin C, Vitamin D3, zinc, magnesium and B12 are imporrtant supplements to maintain. Learn how they interact with each other, and how, snd when to take each (times of the day, with orcwithout meals etc.)


Then, in addition, here is a link to an interesting Youtube channel: Psyhacks.

https://youtube.com/@psychacks