How to build deeper friendships?
Hi there, I'm Rain, 25 yo, non-binary and introvert creature ^^
I feel quite lonely. Even when I'm surrounded by others I feel lonely and I wish I had a close friend that I could share time with and feel understood. I've been longing for a deep connexion in friendship for so long. You know that kind of friendship where each one is always there for the other no matter what they're facing in life... Spending time together, sharing commun interests, doing projects, talking about everything and nothing, traveling around the world, you know...
I do have some friends but we're not that close, and I know it's partly because of me... I do have a lot of trouble opening up and communicate my feelings, my fears, personal stuffs, etc. I'm very bad at understanding myself sometimes too and it's frustrating me... Also in general I'm so bad at socialising, I don't know how to approach people, how to build a conversation, and the few times I tried I felt cringe... I'm often really drained from social interaction due to my introversion, and most people do not understand what is like to be an introvert... And lately I've been wondering if I do have autism and / or ADHD (I'm not diagnosed yet, but I'm seeing a neurologist by the end of June) for multiple reasons actually anyway...
And I guess all those reasons are what stoping me to build deeper friendships... Do you have maybe some tips for me?
@brokenartlostmind Hey there! I hope you are doing well at the current moment. You can try focusing on the small things like striking up a conversation with people that you are interested in talking to. Like other skills like writing or doing sports, socializing skills can also be gained simply by talking to people. Try imagining a hermit crab. A hermit crab will try to find a shell to protect itself from predators. The hermit crab will never know which shell offers the best protection (or which person is committed to support others in terms of socializing) if it never tries any of the seashells. Socializing and finding friends is daunting sometimes, but trying to talk to people you are interested to befriend with is a good way to find someone who can support you(like the hermit crab finding a comfortable home). I wish you the best in your journey of life and finding great friends! :D
@brokenartlostmind I can't provide an answer for you, but I feel the exact same way. I have a few friends. I'm not extremely close to anyone except my ex-wife. I would call most of my friendships casual ones.
I've tried to go to events like the local ones you find through Meetup. Those are hit or miss in terms of findings goods ones.
Hey. I'm sorry that you feel like that. I'm going to tell you something that might help you. It's not that it will work 100% but probably...
I believe, you just need to be yourself and actually honest to yourself.. don't need to get any tips or change yourself for deep friendship because friendship is that beautiful thing which only support being yourself. For relationship etc you or someone might consider changing yourself but not for friendships...
For seeing neurologist it's fine. You can...
