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A choice between maintaining friendship or a good room?

Dreee September 14th



Hello.


I'm in quite the pickle and I'm very indecisive as to what choice to make so I might as well say the story. I'm in my final year in college and I only have two close friends of same gender in uni, I'm quite lonely.


I don't know how to socialize, anyway... Our university has a strict room booking system meaning you pay first, you pick a room first so first come first serve and I've been waiting for one of my friends to pay but they're giving me this vague sense of uncertainty because they don't even know when they're paying and now she also wants me to save a bed for her because she might not resume the first week and I'm not really the aggressive type to tell people 'hey! This is my friend's spot! So don't try to take it' at all costs. I'm starting to think that maybe I should pick a room by myself because I've been waiting for so long and all the good rooms are getting full....


And when I told my other friend about my concerns, she said 'we shouldn't betray her' meaning she doesn't mind waiting longer... But I'm worried, I can't control my friend's financial situation, I understand that but I really do want a good room not a stuffy room or that weird room that has leakages...


Does this make me a bad friend? Because I don't think they would want to associate with me if I pick a room that doesn't have me in it, would they have hate me? And even being with strangers I've never associated myself with, scares me... I feel lost and emotionally burdened...



1
Mel September 22nd

@Dreee Thank you for sharing your situation—it sounds really challenging and stressful. It’s clear that you care deeply about your friends and want to do the right thing, but the pressure of the room booking system is making it even harder to navigate. Your concerns about picking a room for yourself versus waiting for your friends are completely valid!  

What do you think is holding you back the most—your worry about your friends’ reactions, or something else? It’s okay to prioritize your own well-being, and it sounds like you’re really trying to find a balance between that and being there for your friends. We’re here for you, it’s clear that you’re navigating a tough situation with a lot of thoughtfulness!