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Patriot profile picture
Can't Take It Anymore!
by Patriot
Last post
 3 days ago
...See more I can't take anymore of caretaking for my 90 year old mother. She's awful to care for. She's entitled, mean and always wants to fight me.  She's always complaining about being in pain, pick a body part and she'll tell you it hurts.  I'm really beginning to hate her. She has ruined my life! I used to be a happy person, looking forward to my next adventure, but I don't anymore.  People at work brag about how much they look forward to going to home or taking time off to relax. I have no idea what that is anymore. I haven't relaxed in 4 years. I haven't looked forward to anything in 4 years.   Happiness is a thing of the past and never to be experienced again.  Even when my mother dies, I won't be happy ever, ever again because my mother has killed my spirit. I will simply exist, no live anymore. She has ruined that for me and my husband.  I'm not sure why he even sticks around anymore because he's as miserable as I am. He has the freedom to leave but hasn't yet, but I'm sure it could happen in the future and who could blame him. He's been nothing but kind to my mother and she's just as mean to him as she is to me.  My mother has ruined my life.  
Xander1961 profile picture
Hi I’m Xander
by Xander1961
Last post
 February 5th
...See more I’m 60, and have 3 kids , who are 26m and 23f my daughter was recently diagnosed with nhl . I’ve become her main caregiver, as her mother passed 20 years ago from the same cancer she has now. It’s so hard, she’s been fighting since July . But I can’t talk to anyone about this cuz Im staying strong for my girl
Penelee profile picture
Struggling with Empathy
by Penelee
Last post
 February 5th
...See more My husband of 2 years has been struggling with serious health issues, in and out of the hospital for a year now. I am having real trouble finding empathy some days. Internally I’m struggling with a growing resentment. I love my husband and he is very appreciative. Theses feelings are just growing and I’m not sure how to handle it.
CDanielle profile picture
Caregiving ups and downs
by CDanielle
Last post
 February 5th
...See more Hi there! I take care of my blind father with dementia and my wheelchair bound mother, all by myself. They can do a lot for themselves still, amazingly, yet needless to say Im stressed. I need my own job too, but no time. They take care of my needs for now. I have pretty severe anxiety so its not like Im one of those lucky people who are energizer bunnies with a gusto for life, though I do love my life. I am trying and it is my kitties, my fur babies, that keep me going when it gets hard. I so much wish to find others who are in or have been in, similar situations. Thank you for listening. :-)
Hope profile picture
Balancing Caregiving and the Holiday season
by Hope
Last post
 January 24th
...See more Hi everyone! The holiday season can be a mixed one to start with, some like, some dislike it but most find some joy, some stress in it.  For caregivers, it can also be a stressful juggling act. Balancing caregiving duties with holiday traditions can feel overwhelming, leaving you drained and burnt out Here are some tips to navigate the festive season with grace and self-care: * Prioritize meaningful moments with your loved ones and delegate or simplify tasks wherever possible. Remember, the most important gift you can give is your presence, not perfect meals. * Discuss your limitations and expectations with your family and loved ones. Enlist their help in decorating, cooking, or running errands. They want to support you, but they can't read your mind! * Explore festive virtual events or create new traditions that cater to your loved one's needs and your energy levels. * Schedule breaks for yourself, even if it's just a quick walk around the block or a solo cup of tea. Respite is essential to avoid burnout and recharge your caregiving batteries. * Don't be afraid to delegate tasks or ask for help. Whether it's hiring a grocery delivery service or getting a friend to wrap presents, accepting support frees up your time and energy for what truly matters. Remember, the holidays are for everyone, including caregivers! By prioritizing self-care, setting boundaries, and embracing the joy, you can create a festive season that's filled with love, laughter, and happy memories for you and your loved ones. How do you navigate caregiving during the holiday season?
Patriot profile picture
Caretaker Burn Out
by Patriot
Last post
 January 21st
...See more I'm just so spent.  My husband and I have been taking care of my 90 year old mother for the past 4 years.  We've not had a vacation or a weekend away for 4 years. My husband is retired and I still work, so he takes care of Mom during the day and I take over when I get home from work and on the weekends.   Prior to my mom's illness (osteoarthritis-unable to move around unassisted but can still walk) we were very close. We enjoyed each other's company and had fun together. Since she became ill, I've seen a very different side to her. She's overly dramatic with her symptoms, demanding, unreasonable and mean.  She was tested for dementia and the results were she just has age related memory issues but not dementia. It's her attitude that has gotten me so down. She used to be fun, we (my husband and I) loved taking her places, taking her on trips with us, dinners etc... But now she is a bitter, ugly old woman who finds fault with all we do for her. If I clean her bathroom, she'll point out small specks I may have missed, we buy her good quality food, she won't eat it (we've wasted so much money on food for her that she says she likes, then won't eat), complains she wants socks, when we buy her socks she finds fault and won't wear them, the same with shoes & slippers. The list goes on and on.  Both my husband and I are just mentally exhausted. We have no help (can't afford Visiting Angels and we have no family nearby). We can't go anywhere to get away from her.  The only time we get a break is when she is sleeping.   I'm tired all the time, depressed, no motivation and feel hopeless.  My husband, while being a great support, feels the same. No energy, no motivation to do anything. We both feel like we're being held hostage by an ungrateful shrew who is determined to make us feel as miserable as she is and she is succeeding.  She cannot afford to go into a nursing home and my husband is old school and feels since we're her only family (both my brothers have passed in the last 10 years and my father passed 22 years ago) we need to keep her at home as long as we can.  Her doctors are not much help. They just want to put her on antidepressants (she refuses to take them).  Aside from that, they just take her temp, do her labs and send her out the door until next year.  I just needed to vent.  I never anticipated this happening to a woman who was so full of life and had such a great outlook. I also never anticipated how miserable and defeated I would end up feeling at this stage in my life. I see no hope for the future. 
ambitiousNectarine1515 profile picture
Bipolar spouse
by ambitiousNectarine1515
Last post
 January 8th
...See more My husband is bipolar im trying desperately to find someone in the same position to talk to
delightfulUnicorn38 profile picture
Self care for the caregiver
by delightfulUnicorn38
Last post
 November 15th, 2024
...See more    The caregiver is a person who takes a duty to support someone by doing common tasks like  daily help in nutrition, cleaning, physical moving,  taking responsibility of managing the health care of the supported relative, Handle finances and other legal matters; and  Being a companion. the act of providing at-home care for a relative for the long term can bring stress or lead to burnout, especially when the caregiver lacks training and support . self-care can reduce the stress  and avoid burnout  by setting boundaries, joining to support group, getting trained, taking time for own wellness, practicing self-compassion .
PeaceLoveandPaws profile picture
Empowering Caregivers
by PeaceLoveandPaws
Last post
 November 11th, 2024
...See more While caring for a loved one can be very rewarding, it also involves many stressors. And since caregiving is often a long-term challenge, the emotional impact can snowball over time. If the stress of caregiving is left unchecked, it can take a toll on your health, relationships, and state of mind—eventually leading to burnout, a state of emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion. That’s why taking care of yourself isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. Feeling powerless is the number one contributor to burnout and depression. And it’s an easy trap to fall into as a caregiver. But no matter the situation, you aren’t powerless. This is especially true when it comes to your state of mind. You can’t always get the extra time, money, or physical assistance you’d like, but you can always get more happiness and hope through empowerment. * Practice acceptance. When faced with the unfairness of a loved one’s illness or the burden of caregiving, there’s often a need to make sense of the situation and ask “Why?” But you can spend a tremendous amount of energy dwelling on things you can’t change and for which there are no clear answers. * Focus on the things you can control. You can’t wish for more hours in the day or force your brother to help out more. Rather than stressing out over things you can’t control, focus on how you choose to react to problems. * Celebrate the small victories. If you start to feel discouraged, remind yourself that all your efforts matter. You don’t have to cure your loved one’s illness to make a difference. Don’t underestimate the importance of making your loved one feel more safe, comfortable, and loved! *Applaud your own efforts. Find ways to acknowledge and reward yourself. Remind yourself of how much you are helping. If you need something more concrete, try making a list of all the ways your caregiving is making a difference. (Source: Caregiver Stress and Burnout - HelpGuide.org: www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/caregiver-stress-and-burnout.htm#:~:text=%20Avoid%20caregiver%20burnout%20by%20feeling%20empowered%20,to%20feel%20discouraged%2C%20remind%20yourself%20that...%20More%20 [http://www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/caregiver-stress-and-burnout.htm#:~:text=%20Avoid%20caregiver%20burnout%20by%20feeling%20empowered%20,to%20feel%20discouraged%2C%20remind%20yourself%20that...%20More%20]) What are some signs of caregiver burnout? What small victory have you acomplished today? Please share your story! Why might acceptance be helpful in a caregiver's journey? Don’t forget to join the Family and Caregivers community taglist to join in the fun and games. Click HERE [https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilyCaregiverSupport_191/WelcomesIntroductionsIcebreakersGames_310/NewTaglistFamilyCaregiversSubCommunity_229656/] Learn about opportunities to join our leadership team and check out our help-wanted post H [https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilyCaregiverSupport_191/FamilyandCaregiversLeadershipTeam_1735/HelpWantedforFamilyCaregivers_228061]ERE [https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilyCaregiverSupport_191/FamilyandCaregiversLeadershipTeam_1735/HelpWantedforFamilyCaregivers_228061/]
persistentBlackberry6457 profile picture
Hugs to All Caregivers
by persistentBlackberry6457
Last post
 November 7th, 2024
...See more To all of you who feel burned out, underappreciated, like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders- I hear you and so do so many others. Thank you- now go and give yourself a treat, do something you love. Give yourself the care that you give others. Best wishes!
Hope profile picture
Appreciating Caregivers
by Hope
Last post
 October 31st, 2024
...See more Hi everyone! I hope you are well. Being a caregiver can be quite an underappreciated role. Sometimes there is no income, other times it pays less, but regardless of what kind of role you are in, caregiving can feel like a thankless job. If you are a caregiver or have worked with one. What do you think is the best way to acknowledge and apprciate the efforts of a caregiver?
Hope profile picture
Supporting your caregiver friend
by Hope
Last post
 September 2nd, 2024
...See more Hi everyone! Caregiving is hard to say the least but unless we are in that role, its hard to figure out how to support a caregiver especially as caregivers sometimes struggle with asking for their needs to be met.  * Listen to them share their struggles, highs and lows.  * Offer practical help: Can you pick up groceries, run errands, or watch their loved one for an hour? Time is their most precious currency. * Be mindful of their schedule and limitations when planning activities.  * Sometimes they need space, sometimes they crave company. Communicate Remember, even small gestures can make a big difference.  Let's share more tips in the comments! How do you support your caregiver friends?

Family & Caregivers

Welcome to Family & Caregivers! This is a supportive space to share your thoughts and experiences.

“The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other,”  Richard Bach.

 

What are the different forum topics for Family & Caregivers?

Community Space: A place for introductions, icebreakers, games, community check-ins and discussions.

Family Relationships: A place for you to discuss all things relating to family relationships.

Support for Caregivers: Are you a caregiver? Get support and guidance here!

 How can I help?

You can help us by simply responding to threads and sharing your story (if you're comfortable). Check-in with us, join a discussion, or start one! Alternatively, you can join us as a Forum Leader. Check out this thread for more information.

 Helpful Threads

Taglist: Do you want to stay up to date with our community? Then join our tag list to be notified whenever there is a new discussion or update within the community!

 Family & Caregivers FAQ

Q: Are there any sub-community-specific guidelines that we need to adhere to?

A: You can find Sub-community-specific guidelines below, which you should follow in addition to the general forum guidelines.

 Help! I still have a question! 

If you need help, feel free to contact a community leader or post here, and someone will contact you!


Community Guidelines

Guidelines Specific to Family Support Community

1) Be polite, and non-judgmental - Everyone has a different idea of what a "family".  No two families are alike, so please be open-minded and supportive to everyone who shares here. 

2) Please use appropriate language for all ages - This community supports both teens and adults.  Curse/cuss words will be removed from posts.  

3) Some topics may be triggering - If you find a topic here triggering please step away and take a moment of self-care. We try to be inclusive and discuss a wide variety of topics so there will be something for everyone.

4) read  the 7 Cups Forum Guidelines before sending your post  

 

Read the 7 Cups Guidelines
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Community Resources

 Family Stress https://www.7cups.com/family-stress/  

Domestic Assault https://www.7cups.com/domestic-assault-survivor/  

Questions & Answers https://www.7cups.com/qa-family-stress-23/    

Financial Stress https://www.7cups.com/qa-financial-stress-26/  

Sleeping Well https://www.7cups.com/sleeping-well/   

Group Support Chatrooms Group Support chatrooms 

Family Forums https://www.7cups.com/forum/FamilySupport_191/