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Daddy Issues?

amicablePineapple3848 September 3rd

Hello everyone of 7 Cups. I need your understanding.

Background:

I suffer from anxiety, which gives me panic attacks. This is usually due to stress or anything that triggers a panic attack (ex. loud noises, etc.) When I mean by loud, I mean when you are on the airplane and the baby behind you starts crying and then you start hyperventilating and- I think you get the point now. I experience it 2 times in a random month each year. I think first time it was Christmas of 2022 I think.

Topic:

Anyway, I got my panic attack today, at the end of my 4th period class (1. Chemistry 2. I go to a private school that consists of 7 (or 8) periods or sections if you want to think of it that way during school and also consists of 2 periods of lunch- one for junior high (7-8th grade) and another for high school (9-12th grade.)) All my classmates were off to their next class (we all have 2nd lunch) and I experienced it. My Chemistry teacher came up to me to see if I was fine (I was in a position where it looked as if I hurt myself). I replied "I think I am experiencing a panic attack." I started crying and hyperventilating and my Chemistry teacher helped me back to being normal self. I covered my face as her next students were going to go do Chemistry. I ran along the way that I wanted to cry, so I went to the girl's bathroom and cried. I didn't experience a panic attack at all, just a bit of crying. I felt better and went off to wash my face with warm water (good when you cried) and ran to my English class (I was late.) Luckily, it was a sub so I didn't worry too much about it. My friend later asked me if I was fine, replying yes, I had a panic attack. At that point I wanted to cry more, but I was in the bathroom and told my friend I'd send her a note explaining what happened. I did so during an English test (easy,) and we later talked about it.

Fast forward to going back home (yes I called my mom explaining what happened, but my school has terrible phones, so she didn't hear much of it.) I explained my mom what had happened and told me to write the day down. I was going to, but I got distracted looking at Pinterest. A couple minutes go by and my dad walks by my room. He sees me on my phone and tells me to give the phone to him. He grabs it  and walks off to my mom's workroom, where she is busy doing stuff. I follow him, confused as to why he took my phone. He later tells me (in a really rude tone) that the reason that teenage girls have mental health is because of their phone (grabbing it from a scientific study he read online.) I was still confused and silently asked my mom about it. She whispered back that I was on my phone, telling me that she had told my dad (which also means she understood clearly from the phone call and told my dad.) I felt disrespected by the way my dad just pulls science into the subject, which also means that he dislikes it when I have my phone on all the time. It just doesn't make any sense why my dad took my phone away all because of a study he read online. This makes me mad and honestly this is a reason why I don't trust my dad.

When my dad will reach a terrible tone, in a way hurting me, he TRIES to tell me stuff from what he remembers about where I am or where he was, making it an even worse cause.

Theories:

The reason why I think I got my panic attacks:

1. This classmate of mine distracts the teacher, himself, and I from what I'm learning, making it hard for me to understand why this classmate is even in my class. He likes to fool around in class and he recently shaked his pockets that has coins in them, making me have a panic attack.

2. It might be because of stress from overworking myself for too long, which makes it unable for me to focus the lesson at hand.

3. A situation with my online friend- I won't go further into that.

Honestly, I'm don't know if it's because I have parental figures or I'm still a teen on her period. Can anyone give me advice or help by chance?

1
Hope September 11th

@amicablePineapple3848

Thank you for reaching out. I can see that things have been challenging. It sure hurts to feel invalidated by your parents. That is understandably distressful. 

I am unsure what has caused your anxiety/panic attack(s). However, it may be a relief to know that the treatment often tends to be the same regardless of the reason, especially when we are talking about exposure therapy. 

There is an entire series on managing anxiety that is an in-depth workshop into practicing some of the most effective tools to help anxiety and it also addresses panic attacks. If you are unable to connect to a professional and are looking for self-help resources, I recommend the series. You can view it here. 

This post (part of the series) addresses panic attacks.