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Denying Survival

JustBreathe11 February 28th, 2017

"Most people don't understand how much you have to hate yourself to constantly deny yourself something you know you need to survive."

This can be relevant to all eating disorders. What it is saying is that we deny ourselves something that we need. Whether it is eating too much, purging, or restricting, these are all ways to deny ourselves something that we need to survive.

This is frustrating for so many people. Outsiders can have a hard time understanding why we do this to ourselves when we know that it isn't good. Like the quote said, we need food to survive, to live. So why do we do this? Why do we we not eat or eat and purge, or whatever you may do?

Really hard question today:

What purpose does your eating disorder serve in your life, and what is one way that you could try to obtain that in a healthier way?

and

What is one thing you can do for yourself today?

Take care!

With love,

Breathe <3

14
JustBreathe11 OP February 28th, 2017

I'll go first: My eating disorder is a lot about control. So when I feel like I can't control what is happening, my eating disorder finds things to take control over. One thing I can do is try to find other things to control that aren't bad for my health.

Today I am going to work on my calligraphy!

With love,

Breathe

3 replies
Laraland March 1st, 2017

@JustBreathe11 Did the calligraphy help making you feel in control a bit more?

2 replies
JustBreathe11 OP March 1st, 2017

@Laraland

No, I've been working on it for a year now but I still feel like I don't have control over it, however it serves as a great distraction!

Breathe

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xbritx March 1st, 2017

One purpose my eating disorder served/serves in my life is giving me control of something. I feel like when I am partaking in my eating disorder I am in control of my body. Choosing what I do not eat and what I do eat. One way I could obtain that in a healthier way is being aware of my emotions and learning to cope and identify them. When I can do that I will feel like I would have control over one aspect of myself. One thing I can do for myself today is eat 3 meals and find a healthy way to cope with the guilt after it. Coping with this will help me continue in my pathway to recovery.

1 reply
JustBreathe11 OP March 1st, 2017

@xbritx

You've got this!!

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LittleLotte March 1st, 2017

Mine is all about control too. Going vegan really helped me a lot because it gave me the level of control I needed without being overly restrictive. I know this doesn't work for everyone but I initially went vegan for the animals, not because of my ED, which meant I felt I had something to prove to people.

5 replies
JustBreathe11 OP March 1st, 2017

@LittleLotte

I went vegetarian and people were not too keen on this because of my eating disorder, and I'm still trying to figure out if I did it because I care alot about animals (not that I don't and I know that this is for sure a part of it.) or as a way to restrict.

Best of luck!

Breathe

4 replies
LittleLotte March 1st, 2017

@JustBreathe11 I hope you can figure it out. Many people thought I went vegan in order to restrict so I proved them wrong by going out of my way to show myself eating in front of them. I still restrict behind closed doors but never in public. And in some ways, it's helped me a lot. If it's helping you then stick with it.

1 reply
JustBreathe11 OP March 1st, 2017

@LittleLotte

In some ways it has. I've had to learn more about food. And the nutrients that you get because you can't get them from meat.

Breathe

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xbritx March 9th, 2017

@JustBreathe11

I also went vegetarian for a few months. This was for sure due to my eating disorder, however.

1 reply
JustBreathe11 OP March 10th, 2017

@xbritx

Yah I'm still trying to figure my reasoning out. Part of me says that if I have to figure it out, then it probably was not do to good reasons.

Breathe

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lamelane March 4th, 2017

@JustBreathe11 This was simply wonderful. I just want to say how proud I am of you @JustBreathe11

How do you help someone with an ED? They're just so stuborn and don't want to get help and I just have no idea what to do :'c

1 reply
JustBreathe11 OP March 4th, 2017

@lamelane

Really just being there for them is so important. Talking to someone with an eating disorder and trying to help them can take a really long time. Trying really hard to keep any harsh criticisms to your self is big too. If you want more help, let me know! Feel free to message me!

With love,

Breathe

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