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More than income.

convivialPlum6966 January 18th, 2019
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Not really sure if this is the right place to post this. But as much as I'm hoping no one else feels this it's always nice to know I'm not alone.

I live with my parents and brother and sister. The PIPs I get is in my name. And to say the change over from parents getting the money to me getting it wasn't easy is an understatement.

Ever since I've been asked to give some of my money to the house, which is fine. What really gets to me is randomly being asked for quite big amounts of money without warning. Like I'm just another source of income for my parents to call on, so they don't have to watch their own finances as much.

I get they lost an income when I got my money, my dad when out of his way to try and prevent that at the time, failing obviously. He even tried for claim I wasn't capable of understanding money, which I suppose I've never really forgiven him for.

The point is randomly asking me for money makes me feel like I'm only there because of the money. That and a few other reasons are why I still livs at home. I feel like there lives would be a lot easier if I wasn't in it. Apart from they would have less money. I get they need it sometimes. But when there's money issues no attempt is made to sort it and I'm just used as the scapegoat.

Anyway now I just sound like a horrible person who doesn't care about her family situations, don't I? I'm sorry for the rant and if this is thenough wrong place to post something like this.

1
AffyAvo January 19th, 2019
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@convivialPlum6966 Yes this is the right place to post and no, you don't sound like you don't care about family situation. It just sounds like this is creating a problem for all of you.

I'm not familiar with this program specifically, but I know in general that funding related to disabilities are supposed to help with things like daily living expenses, certain medical care or be for savings for the future or specific things like educational programs.

If yours is meant to be for living expenses maybe it would help to set up a budget for yourself and also consider expenses your parents have by you living there. For example, do they pay for any of your food or your medication? There are also costs just with you being there such as additional water use, insurance costs can increase with more occupants and they could potentially have a renter or downsize if you weren't there.

Perhaps giving them a set amount every time you recieve funds based on what's affordable and what you all deem to be fair in regard to you living there would allievate some of the tension? Your family would know that they are being reimbursed at least partially for the expenses they incur and there could be an expectation that they do not ask you for money outside of that amount unless there's an expense that benefits you and you agree to before it occurs?

Even if regular payments won't work, it might help to have a conversation and set up some expectations during a time they aren't requesting money.

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