Wow I hate depression!
Hi, i am a 49 years old male from Denmark who have been fighting depression for more than ten years now. I have tried countless measures to treat my condition: CBT, Meta Cognitive Therapy, Mindfulness, therapy sessions, 7 different types of antidepressants and above all alcohol, which i consumed in extreme amounts resulting i alcohol dependence.
I have no (true) reason not to be happy. I have a nice family, house, job and good physical health.
I really hope this community can help me as i am losing my will to continue the fight. The only reason I get up every morning is for the sake of my family.
@Pbn7Cups something makes you unhappy and with introspection and retrospection you can try to explore for yourself what that is. Do you feel exploited, not loved, unfulfilled, unchallanged etc., it is for you to discover within yourself and your history.
As with alcohol you only have two realistuc choices: 1.be one of the few ones like I saw myself and quit it for good for all the harm it does to you or your loved ones, 2. Learn to embrace and controll your addiction so as it no longer controlls you (a mean symbiosis that helps you live a normal life).
Otherwise you can just struggle like all the others in and out of rehab, feeding the therapists' pockets instead of buying things for your kids and wife, all going downhill, rolling over and over again.
You have smth that many of us do not have, it is your choice, your life, when you find out what is making you unhappy talk to them, talk to your family, talk to your friends, make them understand what pushed you in this dark corner. 10 years is a lot, much too much.
@floreral67, Hi and thank you for your helping words😊 With regards to alchohol I quit it two and a half years ago, and I am never going down that path again, despite fact that for me alchohol is the most effective antidepressant I have ever tried. Within 30 minutes it could make me go from almost suicidal to really happy and content, unfortunately the "side effects" were way, way too serious!
I cannot decide if there is a "reason" for my depression, or if it is "just" caused by unfortunate brain chemistry, anyway I have an extremely hard time "feeling" what I do and do not want, as I cannot find enjoyment or pleasure in anything, or feel love (or lack of love).
I have my hopes up for the Ketamin spray, which has recently been approved in the US, and seems to work on treatment resistant depressions, unfortunately Denmark has apparently decided it has to do its own tests on the product, so I will probably have to drag myself through many joyless years, before I can have access to at treatment that works.🤐
@Pbn7Cups it's this uncertainty and lack of knowledge tgat plagues us about depression...it may very well be chemical, but in my case like some unfortunate others, existing medication did not work...so it is frustrating not knowing what causes it...and that in itself is enough to make someone go bonkers...I am sorry, I am not feeling so cheerful myself today...yes, Europe is more strict about medication legislation but I hope some day you get the spray and works for you. At least one of us will brake loose from the caws of major cronic depression...