Someone I love with depression
A family friend and I became close and aquatinted and spoke of having the same dreams and goals and ended up fallin for each other. Hes a good hard working guy that likes to help people and is responsible. He goes through depressing problems where he isnt happy but spoke of how I was helping him through it and come out of it. As we started the relationship things were good but he got distracted easily with stuff such as his job, drama from his ex and her family, and overthinking something is going to go bad. He was becoming a little apathetic. He was still an affectionate and promising man. He only made promises to his ex that he was with for a quite sometime but it was a tolerant relationship from her cheating and him working so much. He made promises to me and a plan to have a good future. After a couple of months, He started to have coworkers claim he isnt the same guy that jokes or anything, he wont talk about it to anyone and he was pushing people away more. The night after I spent one of many weekends with him he was quiet and didnt talk a lot, and as I checked on him he said he wasnt feeling himself and wasnt happy anymore and he felt like that for a long time. I was shocked and concerned greatly for that. I didnt understand because thats not the josh I knew. I gave him his time but I wasnt able to see him for a couple of weeks and then he was acting as if he wasnt my boyfriend. He wouldnt explain to me the things that was going on and I asked him why didnt he just address me or come to me about this so I could have been informed and let him go if needed, and he said he was just struggling is why. He says I wouldnt want someone with kids and I should want someone who can surrender more time and hes got demons and waging wars in his head hes trying to fix. Its not to do with anyone but himself and this is what he does. He pushes people away to put himself on the right track. Hes trying to make himself happy. I read about all this and it seems hes scared of hurting me with baggage and not being the right guy and even maybe that if I leave it will hurt him and make him even worse. Hes even turned to drinking again. Not like drinking for a good reason but trying to drown his sorrows. He hasnt done that in a long time. He cant face me and before all this I just let him have his time for a few weeks and allowing things to neglect. Im afraid if I keep waiting on not checking on him, he will get worse even more. Ive not heard from him and I want to check on him and be there for him but Im afraid of him rejecting me over and over. I know that some with severe depression do this unconsciously as I do too but I just need insight from those who understand and experienced this too.
@LittleRed24 is that a family member you can tell about his worrying behaviour? I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I'm here if you need to chat ❤
Jem 💜