Question about something I've noticed that I've done all my life

@AutumnEagle When you catch yourself staring into the mirror or whatever else you may do that with, what kind of feelings do you feel, what thoughts do you have?

@AutumnEagle it depends on what are your thoughts at time when you do it? are they same thoughts ?

@AutumnEagle If, when you are looking into the mirror, you can not connect what's inside you to the person you see looking back at you, it might be that you are experiencing depersonalization or derealization. They are a common feature of mood disorders like Depression. Essentially, what it is, is that feeling of not seeming to be in the right body, or in your body at all. Sometimes it can feel like you're trapped inside. Sometimes it can feel like you are not in there, but perhaps floating somewhere above/ outside yourself.
If you think this might apply to your situation, there are a lot of forum threads scattered about the discuss it. If you do a forum search for depersonalization, a lot of them pop up. But if you'd like a couple of direct links, here are two to get you started. Good luck!

https://www.7cups.com/forum/AnxietySupportCommunity_53/AnxietyQA_218/Questionsaboutdissociationanddepersonalization_48533/

https://www.7cups.com/forum/TraumaticExperiencesCommunity_60/DissociationDID_919/Depersonalization_46641/

@AutumnEagle

It dependes on what you feel. How do you feel when you stare at the mirror? It may be a chance for you to reflect your life and think about it, trying to connect with yourself. Or you it can be that you can't connect to your feeling or find you lost your true self. Or it may be lots of reason. Perhapes talk a little more aout what you feel when staring in the mirror?

Thanks for sharing :)

I've always avoided looking in mirrors as much as possible. But I think it's more to do with my gender dysphoria than my depression. On the other hand, I believe that being trans has a big part to play in my depression so...