How can I feel again?
While sadness is something I’m familiar with, the overwhelming sense of ‘nothingness’ upsets me more. The things that used to motivate and drive me now seem like additional punishments. I find myself smiling to make other people more comfortable. It’s more difficult to find joy where I used to. I’m a very passionate person - but I feel like thats gone now. Has anyone else felt like the only emotions that can be taken in are negative?
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I definitely can relate to this. It comes and goes for me, and sometimes I never return to things that I was once passionate for.
You are definitely not alone in feeling this sense of nothingness and numbness. I don’t know if it will be the same for you, but a starting point for trying to ease it for me was realising that I wasn’t allowing myself to feel any positive emotions because I felt like I didn’t deserve to feel anything but the negative. This wasn’t a conscious thing, but I think the fact that I wasn’t letting myself feel all emotions led to me feeling almost no emotions. I still feel numb most of the time, but I’m more aware of times where I’m resisting happiness because I think I don’t deserve to feel it. But also, depression is exhausting and draining and it can be this that causes you to feel numb as you’re just so tired, hence why your motivation is lacking too. Perhaps try starting with small tasks, or since you no longer feel driven to do what you used to enjoy try something completely new. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t become a new hobby, sometimes doing something new that involves concentration can distract your brain and allow emotions to come in again.
