Having depression since childhood?

I don't like saying this but, from what I have discussed with my therapist (who I have only seen for the past 2 year), seems I have struggled with depression way earlier than teenage years. If I had to point out a period, would be 8-9 years old when started. The thing is, I start to feel pretty bad about it:

1. No one seems to believe children can have depression, and even though I exhibited symptoms and everyone shown concern, no one cared to get me help and just thought was a phase and let me go. When I started talking, smiling and eating again "hurray she's okay" but I wasn't.

2. Thinking on how I have struggled for so long is demotivating, because I never remember being "okay" even though I always put a mask. I am recovering in a way, but I had a big trouble accepting change into "okay", and even worse, accepting "genuinely happy" because was a somewhat foreign and scary concept for me.

3. I don't see many people mentioning this aspect, having depression as a child and into adulthood - I am sure (or so I hope) there are people openly discussing it, but I rarely find it, so I feel alone. If anyone has some articles on it, please link them.. Or stories, idk. I just feel I need to relate.

4. Not to mention, I feel like I am making it up. It was a reason why I never really asked for help, because I couldn't pin point when happened, and I know the whole question "why are you depressed" is invalidating for many, as much as me: but for me "when did you get depressed" is even worse. How do you say "since I can remember" without sounding like you are wanting to be a special snowflake of sorts - or wanting your life to sound miserable?

5. My childhood was 'bad' but not Daytime Talk Show bad - and what I mean is, it wasn't dramatic enough to make people go "you poor thing" (good, because I hate pity but bad, because invalidation). Everyone in my family says I had an amazing childhood but.. I won't go deep in it. I just, didn't. It was okay and I had some nice moments that I cherish, but it was bad and I had terrible moments.

Anyone out there experiencing this? Because this experience keeps holding me back, making me feel there is no exit, that I am doomed to rest of my life to always have to fight the depression episodes, and it keeps getting harder to fight, although I have more okay moments now than.. any other time. I just keep expecting it to happen again, a deep depression I can runaway from, as if it's written on my fate since birth.