Feedback for your supporters when they don't quite get it

TW: I discuss self-harm ideation in the following post.

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Let me start by assuring that I am safe. But I'm going through a rough patch in my depression and recently experienced and shared suicidal ideation with my wife, who shared it with my parents. I received support and empathy, but I also received a response from a family member that left me feeling even worse: "Think of your family. You have a promise to keep."

I know this family member's heart was in a decent place. I'm married with two young children, and of course the last thing I want to do is leave my family with a legacy of trauma. As one who has dealt with trauma and depression for a long time, I understand what's at stake. I never want to burden my family like that. At the same time, reading their words left me hurting. I didn't choose these thoughts. I don't turn them on or off at will. They are symptoms of a disease. I'm left to wonder: How do I tell this person that adding guilt to someone going through this level of suffering and suicidal ideation is probably not the best move?

I did some internet research. I found a lot of articles about how you should talk to somebody who is suicidal. But not a lot about how you shouldn't. This "reader response" post from a New Zealand website reflected my thinking but it's not exactly an authoritative source.

Is there an empathetic yet effective way I can communicate to my family member that their words stung me and that there are more helpful ways to respond if I share this level of suffering in the future?

Thank you.