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PeanutButterMurph
393 M Embraced 3
PathStep 17 Compassion hearts63 Forum posts11 Forum upvotes34 Current upvotes34 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2023 Member sinceJune 4, 2023
Bio

I am the proud dad of two amazing little humans and two astoundingly tolerant rescue cats. I love doing outdoor things with my family and engaging in solo pursuits like reading, walking, and running. I am also a person who is trying to get more skilled at managing treatment-resistant major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder.


Recent forum posts
Reaching a Milestone
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 October 5th, 2023
...See more I felt the need to share this: Yesterday marked 60 days since I last took a drink. A lot has happened in that time, and I spent a lot of time in treatment/therapy. I have a lot of work to do still. But this time really feels different than previous attempts at living sober, and I'm excited for the next 60 days.
Experience with SMART Recovery?
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 July 2nd, 2023
...See more I'm newly sober again after a weeklong visit to the inpatient psych unit. This time, I want to stay sober. I've tried AA twice in the past and decided it's not a good fit for me. Now, I'm considering attending a SMART Recovery meeting as an alternative form of support. I'm wondering if anybody else has had luck with this group or can share about what it's like. Thanks.
Feedback for your supporters when they don't quite get it
Depression Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 June 7th, 2023
...See more TW: I discuss self-harm ideation in the following post. ... ------------------------- Let me start by assuring that I am safe. But I'm going through a rough patch in my depression and recently experienced and shared suicidal ideation with my wife, who shared it with my parents. I received support and empathy, but I also received a response from a family member that left me feeling even worse: "Think of your family. You have a promise to keep." I know this family member's heart was in a decent place. I'm married with two young children, and of course the last thing I want to do is leave my family with a legacy of trauma. As one who has dealt with trauma and depression for a long time, I understand what's at stake. I never want to burden my family like that. At the same time, reading their words left me hurting. I didn't choose these thoughts. I don't turn them on or off at will. They are symptoms of a disease. I'm left to wonder: How do I tell this person that adding guilt to someone going through this level of suffering and suicidal ideation is probably not the best move? I did some internet research. I found a lot of articles about how you should talk to somebody who is suicidal. But not a lot about how you shouldn't. This "reader response" [https://www.stuff.co.nz/stuff-nation/17223560/Stop-guilt-tripping-your-suicidal-loved-ones] post from a New Zealand website reflected my thinking but it's not exactly an authoritative source. Is there an empathetic yet effective way I can communicate to my family member that their words stung me and that there are more helpful ways to respond if I share this level of suffering in the future? Thank you.
New here and struggling
Depression Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 June 12th, 2023
...See more I joined 7 Cups a couple days ago when my depression was a little lighter and I actually felt like taking steps to get better. Although I've been managing my depression and anxiety for over 25 years, I've lately found myself in a particularly bad patch. I'm not sure if this is the best spot in the sub-community for going into the details; I'm still learning my around this platform. So I'll keep this brief. PBM P.S. It took a lot to write this because currently I don't want to do much of anything.
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