Not sure about anything
My life has been a rollercoaster. I miss the time I lived in ignorance, because at that time I had none of these worries, I thought I was a worthy catch and a great person. But when I awoken, I realized I was alone and everyone who was around me only wanted something from me. I had no real friends, no one who really cared about me. I separated myself from outside world. Well, let's just say I returned to my solitary life. Most of my post-highschool life was solitary. It's been 9 years since I withdrew and I feel hopeless, lonely and afraid to start again.
I'm depressed but live in a state where I distract myself by keeping busy with unimportant things. I pace about the house a lot, talking to myself, well brainstorming. I'm on the internet googling any random idea that comes to my mind. Anything to not stay in a depressed state. I'm constantly coming up with brilliant ideas I never feel confident enough to complete. I do believe my Enneagram type is 6w7, because it has always been my desire to escape this situation and be great. But that time never comes.
Young guy here, 21, tho I understand a bit of how your feeling, being alone, having no friends really does take a toll on you if you don't try to make yourself your own friend. People are tough to deal with at times so you gotta accept that at times you will have those times alone. But hey, just think that there will always be peeps here, even one person that knows what being alone is like, eventually you won't be alone, just keep fighting, keep working, step outta your comfort zone at times, learn to be happy alone so it's not misery. Don't look at it as getting friends to cheer you up, get friends that you feel are worth your time.
Sorry that you have been struggling. What kinds of things are you imagining that you are having trouble completing?@friendlyBalsam3503
Let's start with the Rollercoaster part, what made life this way.
I felt that when I went to school I would never make the right friends.
I may not know your diagnosis but I respect your privacy so don't worry about it.
It's okay I don't feel like putting down the state of the subject, I can respect that.
I know this guy whonwas kept in solitary and when he got out he laughed at all things.
Usually when I wake up I explain to my self that there will be nothing to worry about for the day and I could just explain my worries on the app like everybody else.
It's normal to believe life as a ignorant aspect because that's something we go through and that we face so it's fine in the end.
I dreamt that the world was mine and I was so alone but that was just me day dreaming and then I had to answer a few questions at program is where I spend a few hours out of the day.