I lost myself

Hi... im spanish speaker, so... i still learning english! 

I feel sad. I ended a relationship in which I suffered a lot. I don't want to make this long, so I'll be brief. My bf belittled me and had anger issues; he would take it out on me, say hurtful things... that our relationship seemed like a waste of time to him, I made many mistakes—I am NOT perfect—but I always tried to make things right between us. He was the type of person who enjoyed doing activities with others that he no longer wanted to do with me, and that hurt me deeply. He would always say that I was his priority, yet his actions told a different story. I feel terrible about myself for putting up with this kind of treatment, and I feel empty because I spent so much time hoping things would improve when they only got worse. I don’t know how to feel about it. At 23 years old, I have never felt truly loved by anyone; people tend to leave me. I’ve always felt like everyone’s last choice, and that hurts so much.

Throughout my life, I have suffered many things: bullying, harassment, mistreatment, and my bf knew this, yet he still invalidated my emotions because, to him, it didn’t compare to what he had suffered. He made me feel really bad... I have no one else to talk to about all of this, so I decided to share this today.