Hiding
Have you ever done this? After getting screamed at, insulted, cursed out; the first thing you want to do is runaway and hide. Someplace small and dark. Somewhere you will be protected. Somewhere you can cry and no one will know. Somewhere you can feel sorry for yourself and reflect on all of the mistakes that led to this point. Somewhere the world can forget about you.
I'm sitting on the floor in a small space between my bed and the fireplace. I've been here for a long time. It's past one o'clock and I'm typing. Hoping that there is one person somewhere out there so I don't feel so alone. Does this sound contradictory? Do I want to be alone or do I want someone to share my loneliness with? How do you feel alone in your own house?
I'm sorry. I just needed to let it out a little. I finally cried. But it didn't help. Has anyone out there felt like this? If you have, please let me know that I have kindred spirits in the world.
@NotAllHere713 sits in the little space with you ❤ wraps you up in a cosy blanket and cuddles you up ❤ or if you prefer to sit alone there I'll sit on the opposite side of the room ❤ I've been there more than once. The times where you just want to be alone curl up in a cave and just be! It's a horrible feeling😥 also when I get scared and upset I hide under my blanket and won't come out for hours. In those times I won't even let my carers come in my room. But then I come on here, just like you have ❤❤ we both know we are safe on here, and no-one can hurt us ❤❤ would you like to tell me how your feeling?
@Tinywhisper11
Thank you! Thank you making feel less alone and afraid.
I was feeling the lowest I've felt in a while. I even cried. And I don't cry easily or often. It's a horrible feeling when you are verbally attacked by someone close to you. I just wanted to find a deep dark hole and hide away from everyone and everything. But the things I can't run away from are deep in my mind. Echoes of the insults and name calling take a while to fade. Each echo making me feel over time that maybe it is all my fault.
@NotAllHere713 it's ok to cry, I understand completely, if someone says something hurtful , I cry too, and want to hide away. My biggest fear in people is anger! Are you afraid of anger too? What's your self esteem like? Are you feeling a bit better today? I know with me it takes a few days to get over mean words. I'm right here for you ❤ and I'm worried about you, gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤ I hope today will be a better day ❤❤
@Tinywhisper11
Thank you for the hug! I needed that. It's been a few days and I am not as deep in the hole as I was. One of the problems is that I can't forget or forgive. The other problem is that the other person doesn't remember or chooses to believe that it didn't happen. So we are polite strangers right now. We will see how long this truce lasts. I am grateful for you and 7 Cups for offering support and an outlet for my emotions.
@NotAllHere713 always here for you ❤❤
Thank you for sharing @NotAllHere713. Yes, a also have felt like that. I also have a small space in my house where where I can runaway and hide for a while. A place where I can feel safe, to be myself and to cry if I need to. ❤️❤️❤️