Why Bother
Hi
Sometimes, pretty much like now, I wonder really what is the point in living. I always believed that we give our own lives meaning, that we will arrive where we are meant to be however we choose how to get there.
Tomorrow I have work, overall I love my job. I do not get to do my job to my full potential due the staff shortages. Every day I work I have to put in 150% of my energy and just get on with it. If I do not get on with it I will be in trouble. It is difficult and is beginning to eat away at me outside of work. Being introvert in an extroverted job is difficult enough with out staff shortages.
I feel so uninterested to interact with the world and more so feel the world is uninterested to interact with me. I often think that life is so meaningless and pointless that I should just do all the things I want....even if it is on my own. I want to go to the zoo..I should just go myself... want to see the botanic gardens...why not just plan a trip for just me....move to Canada....learn something new - as much as we ask why...why not... it often feels like it would be easier that way, I just wish I had the drive, motivation, will power to do it and not care what others thought........
Being alive is difficult. I feel I am fighting everyday.
Hey there. I was just about to vent about this feeling as well. I don't feel like many understand it. My psychologist keeps telling me that I should find meaning in my life, but it feels like I'm only a means to an end. I'm a tool. You and I take pride in our work but are never properly rewarded for it. It feels like it should be satisfying when it isn't.
If you have the means, you should request time off and work on yourself more. Don't fill in a role as a worker, be yourself. Go to the Zoo, try to focus on what you love about it. Is it the light hearted atmosphere? Is it the collection of animals? Whenever you feel down, try to focus on what makes you feel, well, alive again. I know if I were to go to a zoo right about now I'd feel so happy. The last time I visited was in October, and I remember I really enjoyed seeing the animals. It's kind of inspirational to see that, despite living in an environment as a spectacle for people to see and learn about, they continue to live and sometimes thrive.
What line of work are you in?
