Trouble opening up
I want to get help or to simply vent but I have a very hard time writing a post or starting a conversation about my issues. I join all sorts of depression support groups or support groups related to my (physical) illnesses but I never post in them when anything related to those topics bother me. I rarely leave a reply on people's posts too because I find it pointless as long as I can't actually help. I've been wondering why... I think it's because I find it useless in the end. I post about the problem, people leave nice, supportive comments and I'm still there, with my problems unresolved... I also have a hard time feeling ok about it, I feel like I'm whiny and annoying.
I have three questions:
1. How many of you do/feel the same?
2. How do you think I should approach this issue?
3. What other questions should I ask (myself)?
@softcottonpad
1. How many of you do/feel the same?
I feel the same. I often don't post much, I'm trying to do the self-esteem challenge, though. But in general....I never say anything, anywhere. This is really a first for me.
2. How do you think I should approach this issue?
There's a lot of pain in this world. That doesn't mean we have to stop finding even the tiniest sources of hope and love. If a stranger on the other side of the world feels your pain, and wants to help you through it, I think that's beautiful.
The worst feeling I've had is feeling utterly alone. Loneliness kills. Feeling alone, like nobody understands you, nobody cares.....it's devastating, and numbing.
If you can connect with someone through a site like this, someone who has had similar experiences, someone who does care about you feeling better, it will help. I promise.
If you haven't already, try to open up to someone in your life. A friend, a family member, someone on this site. Support is there for you, even though it can feel like there is nothing.
3. What other questions should I ask (myself)?
I think maybe consider why you feel it is useless. If commenting to other people helps them to know they aren't alone, is it still useless?
If other people commenting on your posts, with affirmations and expressions of solidarity, lets you know you aren't alone, is it still useless?
What do you want to feel when people answer your posts? What are you looking for?
What would you tell yourself, if you were a friend? If you took a step back, what advice would you have for someone in this situation?
What needs to change in your life to help ease the pain or loneliness?
Sometimes I have a hard time with this as well because of social/relationship anxiety and I'm afraid about not being taken seriously, or being lied to and led on, or being judged as boring or "too sensitive" (such as "Oh, what are you crying about? Stop being so sensitive and making a big deal out of it!").
When opening up about anxiety and/or depression and then being misjudged about it, that is hurtful to me and also a mjaor misconcenption about anxiety and depression. It is NOT something you just briefly cry about and get over just like that.
That's my two cents! 