Thoughts
I feel like I have so much energy I can't use , I'm so frustrated . I punched a wall a few times , been throwing my phone everywhere, I want screaming or just run into a wall has as I can. This feeling is overwhelming me.
I think I know what caused it. I went to a funeral yesterday , I saw two women who I didn't leave on the best of terms with, I just started think about how those relationship ended and I saw myself as a problem . Started thinking about why I can't maintain such relationship, the answer was not good. And I also thought how excited I'm feeling about going to the strip club because I can't deal with real women. And that really makes me sad because that was the only positive thought I had for this month and now it's moved to self hate. I can't stand myself, what's wrong with me.
What happens if a Christian commits suicide? Do they go to Heaven?
@HiMisterKyle First of all, it sounds like you might need an outlet for all that energy inside of you. Exercise, go out a little. Please don't hurt yourself. And it sounds like you went through a difficult time. I want you to know that the first step towards solving a problem is acknowledging it. Now that it's in your consciousness, you can work towards finding a solution. We as a community will support you through this journey to forming healthier relationships. 
