Parents "dumping" their issues on me worsens everything. How to deal with it?
Hello,
my mother has the habit of "dumping" her emotional baggage on me. That means constantly talking about her issues. While I am sympathetic to her issues. I currently don't have the strenght or patience/time to support her, our relationship isn't that great and it's worsening my own depression and anxiety.
My mother isn't able to get a therapist on short notice (three months waiting period at least) and I'm not even sure if she wants one. She has her siblings to share her issues with and does so. But also feels the need to share her issues and worries with me constantly, even after I told her multiple time that I have a lot of other things going on (she is well aware of most of them).
So are any of you guys in the same situation or do you have some tips or strategies to cope with this? :)
Thank you! :)
@VirginiaWolf92 I understand that your mum constantly offloading onto you can cause you stress, probably the most important thing is to let her know that obviously you are there for her but you also need her to calm down with offloading as it is really impacting your mental health. Strategies of coping, we'll try not to take on everything she is saying be her shoulder not her therapist. Whatever she is telling you maybe just be an ear and try not to worry about her. She is an adult an can take care of herself and as you said has a lot of great support other than your kind self :)
don't just focus on her problems, maybe try to weave in issues you have so you both can have a good rant. Or talk to us on here about your problems to get them off your chest putting you in a better mindset to talk about her problems. Remember she probably doesn't want you to deal with them just listen to her, everyone wants to be listened to ☺