I think I need help...

Hi. I've been feeling so depressed this past month and I'm really at the point of giving up. I hate my life, it just feels like my depression is getting progressively worse. I lost my mom a long time ago and I found out recently that my dad's health conditions are getting worse. I'm old enough to take care of myself but I have a younger sister that needs special attention. So that's one thing that's been stressing me out.

Work has been stressful too. There has barely been a work shift where I was okay, and didn't want to cry. A lot of my shifts recently have been ending with tears, anger or both. I want to quit so bad but I have to make my own money to provide for my essentials and everything else.

The stress has gotten to the point where I drink a ton of alcohol almost every night to stop myself from committing suicide. But really, even that is terrifying me. I got pretty drunk a few nights ago by myself and I was ready to take at least 5 painkillers with alcohol. I was so close to putting it in my mouth until I stopped myself and began to sob. If I didn't run out of alcohol, I think I would've ended it today. Living tonight is so painful.

I just wanted someone to listen, that's all. Don't care if no one responds...