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Is there is a way out

User Profile: WickedSick
WickedSick August 17th, 2017

Hello there, just some random venting

I have been depressed as far as I can remember, I have done everything that came to my mind to cope with my depression, but with no luck, people told me, change your job, it will do you good, did that, things got better for a month, and return to the same old story, people said, you just need to socialize, I made tons of friends, same thing with my work, got better for awhile, and then same old story, people said, learn a hobby, I did that, and it did not last long and it became like anything to kill time, therapy suggested few things as well, and its always same story, temp reliefs and back to the same numbness, and doing things like a robot, did change almost every aspect in my life, but with no results, just complete waste of time, money and effort

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User Profile: infinitesimalways
infinitesimalways August 18th, 2017

@WickedSick I think it depends on what triggers your depression. Four years ago, I was going through a severe depression because I felt isolated in school and unsatisfied with my life. I wanted a reason to wake up every morning. I found one when I started dating this girl. With her, I completely forgot what being depressed felt like -- to the point that, when she would tell me that she was still depressed even with me, I felt personally attacked/responsible, like I wasn't doing enough for her the way she was helping me through my own depression. Ever since the break-up with that girl, I've been in the worst state I've ever been. So apparently, the possible triggers of my depression are abandonment issues and fear of being alone.

What does your personal depression feel like?

2 replies
User Profile: CoinFountain
CoinFountain August 18th, 2017

@infinitesimalways

What triggers mine is a combination of high anxiety (some PTSD related) and Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). What gets me through the worst parts are remembering the people I want to see again at some point and the thought if I give up it means that I won't be around to potentially help anyone else. I don't want anyone to feel like I did so it helps me create meaning in my life to help others when I have enough "spoons" of energy to use on that. Mindfulness guided audio has also helped greatly day to day just with feeling less overwhelmed. Also other things that help me vitamins especially D3 (for serotonin), exercise, avoiding too much isolation and when it gets bad enough SSRI to take enough of the edge off so I can keep doing that other stuff.

1 reply
User Profile: CoinFountain
CoinFountain August 18th, 2017

Oops, I meant to post as reply to whole thread not just one person.

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User Profile: Beckieg30
Beckieg30 February 5th

@WickedSick hey, depression is a very hard battle and everyone deals with it differently. I'm sorry to hear your story. Mine is more made up of Truma from my childhood, ptsd, anxiety. Was also neglected and quite a lot of abuse was involved. I completely understand where you're coming from. It's a never ending pattern that's happening. Also where life is getting harder, it becomes more harder to find a good job. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course many people are different. But you also have to live for you and not on other people's advice. When I'm in a dark place, I either call my Dr's to talk with them, I used to be bad. Now I've changed my mind set on many ways. And life is becoming a lot better. Also when I was working in mcds, that was a dead end job. But I made it better in ways that suited me. Like when doing the dinning area I would do it in a pattern which helped a lot. I turned it into a routine to make the job just that little better. Hope things get better for you too. 

User Profile: GoldenBear16
GoldenBear16 May 7th

@WickedSick

I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a tough time. It sounds like you've been trying a lot of different things to cope with your depression, but nothing seems to be providing long-term relief. It must be incredibly frustrating to feel like you're stuck in the same cycle despite all your efforts. Just know that you're not alone, and there are people willing to listen if you want to talk more about what you're going through. Sometimes, just having someone to vent to can make a difference.

@WickedSick it can be really frustrating to feel that you have done everything possible when it comes to dealing with depression without seeing any noticeable outcomes. I imagine that i would be also incredibly upset if I put myself in your shoes. 

how different do you think your life would look like if you are no longer feeling down?