I relapsed...again

Chances of relapse is sth that comes with depression. The more episodes you have, the more chances of next episode to come but that doesn't it's a death sentence you can much do to reduce the severity, duration and frequency of the next episodes. It could include taking help early in the episode in the form of psychotherapy and in medications. Doing walk or any exercise on regular basis, music, deep breathing, mindfulness. These things might help along with treatment. The key is to start small like a 5 min or 10 min walk and build up from there.

I hope you find here, the strength, you need to tackle the episode

@bestMap6925 You didn't mess up, and this does not define who you are. Sometimes relapses happen when life piles up on us (sometimes it's stressful things happening, sometimes it's stressful emotions we are building within our own mind). When the urge comes back stay armed with ideas of other outlets: exercise for me is huge for me. If I exercise every day it keeps my mental health in check (walk, run, skip, jump road, stretch, hike, swim, throw a ball at a target, frisbee, etc). Other ideas writing, reading, calling a friend, volunteer at an animal shelter and hang out with cute animals, the possibilities are endless. Talking is huge, this is a great step in the right direction. Talking with friends, places like here, or a licensed professional, all are good ideas. All the best. Stay well. You can do this. Life is beautiful.