@Howliteblue I understand exactly what you are dealing with. Unfortunately, this website doesn't always have the best listeners available, and the odds of finding a decent, passionate listener is decreasing by the day. The people who become listeners are volunteers, and they are usually people who suffer from depression or other things that can affect their mood. That means that, even if they put in a great deal of effort on this website, they may lose interest eventually.
I used to have a listener account myself. I haven't found the motivation to use it for months, but there was a time when I was really passionate about being a listener and I truly wanted to help people. I did a lot of those guides that shape people into a better listener, and I followed all of the guidelines and message suggestions. However, sometimes being a listener isn't an easy job either. I would get requests from people who made the conversations really difficult to move forward with. Some people simply aren't willing to share their story, which is unfortunate, because there is nothing I can do for them if I don't know what they're going through. Also, sometimes you encounter trolls who want to talk about inappropriate things, and they lower your listener rating before you can block or report them. Oh, and then there are members who read your message and don't respond (listeners do this too, of course). These things take the joy out of helping others. I was using all of my energy to try to support people in need and be there for them, but it never did any good for me, and I was wasting a great deal of time on people who didn't deserve it.
Then, of course, there is the perspective that I agree with you on. There are a lot of listeners on this website who are trained very poorly. I once had a conversation with a listener who was really getting on my nerves. Their messages didn't make any sense at all, they took ages to reply, and it was clear to me that they didn't follow the guide that every person is given before becoming a listener. When I brought this up, this person said that they didn't care about the rules and that they refused to follow them. And that listener isn't the only one. There are many people on this site who should NOT be listeners. I don't know why they are; it is clear to anyone who speaks to them that they really don't care about it. Instead of trying to help members, they just waste their time. I've connected with numerous listeners on an old account, and many of them stopped responding without so much as a "Goodbye," some were rude or asked for personal information, and some blocked me, even though I asked if it was okay to talk about a specific topic. Overall, my experience with listeners is a very negative one.
Unfortunately, that's just how it is. Nobody is perfect, and ANYONE can become a listener. This site is built on volunteers. Unless someone has a reason to become a listener, I don't believe that they should... Still, that is what they do. I've connected with people of a high title before (people who had over 200 chats and who spent a lot of time of this website), and it was clear to me that they no longer cared about their position either. It's just sad, really, to see this website going through such a downward spiral. More and more people lose interest each year.
(I'm out of time. I really wasn't sure how to end this message. But good luck to you. There are some good listeners on here, and I hope you find them.)
