I need to let it all out

Hey everyone, I really need to express all the things that are oppressing me right now and I thought that would be the best place to do it.

I feel on the verge of another crisis. I feel the loneliness growing inside of me. I have this oppressing feeling that in the end everything Im doing now will lead me to nothing. The people Im getting affectionate to will leave and my current life will change once again, before I can even get myself used to it. Everything Im building will go to waste. My dreams, thoughts, emotions, hopes, all useless. Ill get attached and Ill get used to people and routines and Ill end up suffering again when Ill realize that I dont matter to anyone. Its a life made of feeling out of place and trying to please others. I dont know how to go on and I have no motivation. Im scared of all these bad thoughts and of mind. Im scared Ill be the cause of my destruction.