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I feel sad and lonely a lot

lonelygirl077 August 25th, 2022

Hi! Not sure where to begin, i'm 26, and i do feel very sad and lonely sometimes. People say "Everyone has those kind of days." But i think it goes deeper? Last week i was so down, i felt so useless und unworthy of love. I couldn't sleep that night because i had to cry and couldn't stop.


I do date a guy (my first relationship ever), and it seems to go downhill honestly. Which just adds to my bad mood.

Sure, i could go to my friends and ask them to do something. But the thing is that it feels so exhausting to have human interactions sometimes.

I love my friends, but i sort of have been "ignoring" their messages for days. Which makes me a bery bad friend.


Sometimes i talk to people online, mostly guys, and i notice that i get attached to them really fast. But talking to people online seems much more comfortable for me. Yet i get jealous of people who post all those fun trips with their partners or friends on social media.

Since i had an IRL Interaction with a guy i crave that true love and affection. But 99% of the time i don't feel worthy of it. And i think i'm just too complicated.


I have social anxiety (it was diagnosed when i was around 13) and i am not sure if i do have depression? I don't want to see a therapist and REALLY confirm it. My brother has Depressions and i can't be the second child to have it, i can't do that to my parents.



And sorry if this is all over the place, just a lot of thoughts running through my mind right now.

I would just like to get an outside perspective on this i guess?

2
amiableBlackberry92 August 26th, 2022

@lonelygirl077

I understand your sad lonely feelings I've had them too.

I had a very abusive childhood and it caused me to not love myself. I never thought I was good enough because of all the bad stuff that happened to me. So that being said I've been on a journey to figure out why my relationships are shallow and unconnected. All I've ever wanted was a true connection with another human . I definitely suffer depression and anxiety but my experience in therapy has been incredibly life altering in a good way. I realized I needed to love myself first. All 3 of my siblings have some kind of depression from our childhood experiences. But I needed to get to the bottom of my unhappiness. I recommend you put yourself and your needs first and do what you need to do to take excellent care of yourself. I wasted a lot of years floundering around in pain and I wish I'd taken steps to help myself a long time ago. But it is never too late right!?

Best of luck

ABB đź’ś

ElenaGeneris August 26th, 2022

@lonelygirl077

Oh, that must be awful, feeling unworthy of love… You are having trouble in your first relationship, which is making you feel sad and lonely. You cried as well…

It seems you want to hang out with your partner and friends like other people on social media do. You are craving for love and affection from a partner. Hanging out with your friends might help, but your social anxiety is making human interaction feel exhausting at the moment. Your friends are reaching out to you but you are ignoring their messages, making yourself feel more lonely and feeling bad about it.

And I understand that you don’t want to trouble your parents by being their second child with depression. Life is full of ups and downs. Not necessarily depression, but it is definitely a down phase in your life right now. How do you think it will affect you if you reply to your friends’ messages and make plans to hang out with them?

I would encourage you to take the 7 Cups Emotional Wellness test to get a better understanding and clarity of your emotions: https://www.7cups.com/free-emotional-wellness- test/.

Also please check out these resources:

https://www.7cups.com/how-to-deal-with-loneliness/

https://www.7cups.com/depression-help-online/

https://www.7cups.com/social-anxiety/