Hit an all time low.
Not really sure where to put this..but here i go.
Broke up with boyfriend of 10 years on new years day, flirting with another woman on FB. Also no interest in each other, he would just be on the PC or leave me at home while he went off his friends. He used me for a few months for 'one thing'..and i let him, only when i put a stop to it did he become the man i would of loved to have been with, always out and going to events. He has met someone else and it has made me feel....well....like i wanna die.
Today was especially bad, went to The Lakes (local mental institution) for an assessment. I will now have to go a couple of times a week and talk or see what other services they offer. Walking back home i started to feel dizzy (I'm type 1 diabetic) sat on a wall and had my sugar tablets but it didnt help and i feel backwards. A man thought i was drunk. Had to call my brother and i couldn't walk, suddenly there were 4 people around me all trying to help then cops showed up then i was taking into the ambulance. Ambulance lady noticed my self-harm cuts on my arm. She was lovely and gave me advice, she had been through heart break before.
So anyway, I'm now at home...back is absolutely killing me. I wanna move on, I know it will take me longer, I feel so unhappy and i have no friends (because me and him had mutual friends but they all stayed with him..majority of them were his friends first) I AM SO FED UP!
I'm sorry you had to go through all this. I can't say I have been I'm a similar situation, or that I know how you are feeling, but I can empathise. It doesn't sound like you were happy in that relationship, and he may never have become the person you wanted him to be, so although it hurts now, just know that this may allow you to find someone who treats you in a way that you deserve. Someone who treasures you and will care for you, and wouldn't dare to look at another woman because they know they are lucky to have you.
But until then, you can focus wholey on yourself, and try and get out there and find a better group of friends that will stand by you. I am happy to talk if you need someone to chat to. I hope I've been helpful and not made things worse in anyway! :)
