Introduction + Thank You
Hi, I'm IndigoRoses, or Caroline, whichever is easier. I'm a high school student. I've been active on 7 Cups for around a year now but became a member this past summer for a whole bunch of different reasons. I love hiking and writing (a career at BuzzFeed would be incredible) and I can (kinda) ski in the winter.
I made a forum post introducing myself a VERY long time ago but felt that it needed an update. There's a few things I've been meaning to say for a while but haven't been able to work up the courage. I figure that a new year is a perfect time to post this so that I can start 2016 off right.
--Trigger warning just in case, don't read the next paragraph if you aren't in a good place right now.--
I struggle with depression and self-harm, and have for around 5 years now. Bullying has been a common occurrence throughout my time at school, especially in middle school. I dislike myself greatly and this has led to the mindset that everyone else does too, which I'm trying to work on. There are many days where I lie in bed letting my alarm ring and am simply unable to get up. I'd have to say that I was at my worst about a year ago, when I cried myself to sleep almost as frequently as I self-harmed, and isolated myself to the point where I had pushed my friends away. I apologized for things that weren't my fault and had a deep hatred for myself. I noticed myself slipping back into this routine a few months ago and decided to join 7 Cups as a real member.
The first few days on my account were spent by silently observing the chat rooms. I would say, "Hi!" and nothing else, because nobody responded to me. Can I blame them? I was practically invisible. I barely noticed myself there. As I began becoming more comfortable, I started responding to the problems people were having in the chat rooms. Many of them were going through a lot of the same things I was, to my delight, and it was nice to be able to talk in a non-judgmental, safe environment.
I am still trying to break the habit of becoming an observer, or lurker, but it is still difficult. I have trouble talking in person and am incredibly shy. Some of my words don't come out quite right, and I often mix up words when speaking. That's why I love to write- I can plan exactly what I want to say and I know how it will sound when read.
This post has been all over the place, but I wanted to finish it off by saying an enormous thank you to a whole bunch of wonderful people.
Thank you to every member and guest, supporting me and loving me even when I couldn't love myself.
Thank you to every listener, both ones I have talked to and ones I haven't, for all the work you do.
Thank you to the friends I have made, for sharing your stories and listening to mine.
Thank you to the mods, who have been kind and have been known to give me compliments during discussions that I still have a hard time accepting (but I'm working on that too).
Thank you to everyone I tag below, for having a positive impact on my life, whether you realized it or not. You're all amazing people, and I appreciate what you've done for me and everyone else who needs some love. I likely forgot around 200 incredible people in the list below, so if you're one of them, I love you too :)
@canadagrander6 @Odetodoubt @amazingrea @ImL @Allergictodarkness0 @LadyAlexa @Givelove8 @221Skye @Kaylee @NewRomantic677
Thank you, 7 Cups, for giving me somewhere to turn when I was completely lost.
*It's also worth mentioning that I had no idea the font would turn out huge, sorry in advance*
<3 <3 <3
Thank you, that was both needed and appreciated <3 *hugs*
Thank you, that was both needed and appreciated <3 *hugs*
You're so sweet and awesome. And I feel special because you tagged me. :3 I love you dear! <3
Thanks so much, you're an awesome person <3
Indie *huggles* Thank you for introducing yourself ^-^ It was great to read and I absolutely agree with you, participating more would be coolio :D
I am always around if you ever want to chat, lovie, just PM me <3
(pssst, font sizes are confusing, and I liked the look of it anyhoo! ^_^)
Thank you rea <3 that means a lot :)
Omg first can I just say I totally want a career at BuzzFeed too, but for their Videos :P BTW, this post is really awesome and I'm glad you wrote it and I'm even more honored to be tagged in it, you just made my month ❤
This post was just AMAZING to read, like I'm really happy that you wrote it ❤ I know writing posts and putting yourself out there more often is tough, whether its on the forums or on the chatrooms :p I really admire you though, because setting these goals for yourself is a sign of your strength in my eyes! I can see why as a newbie the chatrooms are a little daunting (and so is the forum wilderness, lol) but I'm happy you slowly started getting involved and you're working towards participating more, I'm sure you can reach that goal and you have my full support on that one (I shall be your hyperactive cheerleader, lol) Anywhoo, I remember you from a few discussions, and your participation really did brighten the chatroom up! ❤ you have amazing things to say (this brilliantly written thread written by you clearly proves my point hehe) and I hope that in 2016 you reach your goal :)
P.S-- I'm always willing to be here for ya if you have any questions or want to talk, maybe one day you could even try leading a discussion! Whatever I can do to help, just let me know and I'll do my best to make it happen! Also thank you for the lovely shoutout at the end, that was super sweet! ❤
This is exactly why I tagged you, I swear you're one of the kindest people here <3 Thank you so much, I basically aspire to be you. *hugs* It means a lot!
This is exactly why I tagged you, I swear you're one of the kindest people here <3 Thank you so much, I basically aspire to be you. *hugs* It means a lot!
Aww look at all the pretty colours!
This is an amazing post and so awesome to read, I'm incredibly pleased that you've been slowly but surely increasing your confidence on the site and it's great to know that 7 Cups has been helping you! *big hugs* 
Thanks!! <3 *hugs* I really appreciate it :)