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How do you remind yourself to trust people again?

friendlyTortoise7027 June 24th, 2016

Weird question I know, sorry, but hear me out.

I'm having issues with trust and vulnerability. Issues fighting this strong feeling that it's pointless, useless to reach out, I wouldn't know what to talk to anyway...

How do you push yourself? Sometimes it kind of happens naturally and sometimes I have to prod myself along.. I'm sorry if this is somehow in the wrong section

2
SenpaiXD June 24th, 2016

@friendlyTortoise7027

Start by giving people small, repeated opportunities to display their trustworthiness. (That means really trusting them - not trying to monitor, control or contract them into behaving well.) Small meaning small things that you feel comfortable with - meeting up somewhere at a specific time...etc.

At the same time, find opportunities for them to place trust in you. Live up to this trust scrupulously. You want to make sure that you are reliable to them. And that they can confide their trust in you.

The best way to develop trust is reciprocally (back and forth) and incrementally (bit by bit) over time. And gradually increase the opportunities as time goes on. By letting yourself become trustworthy, people who heavily value trustworthiness will want to be around you.

Best of luck!

1 reply
CacoethesScribendi June 24th, 2016

@SenpaiXD Very helpful post, thank you. 👍

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