Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

Suffocated

Today I feel like giving up and throwing in the towel as they say. Like maybe this endless thing we call life isn't worth living anymore, but then I think of his smile. His warm kiss on my cheek and the way I'd leave him broken and all alone. So instead I take out that stupid blade and run it over my skin over and over again. And just for a few precious moments the negative thoughts stop and "life" makes sense again. Why am I like this? I feel nothing and everything all at once and it's awful.

I feel like I can't find joy in anything that i do.... and I know I have no reason to feel like this. I'm not happy with my life although it's a perfectly normal, acceptable (in the eyes of society) lifestyle that I live. But inside I'm miserable knowing that because of my decisions and how I've chosen to end up where I am I will never accomplish anything I set out too... just hard to live with that when you can't find joy in any aspect of your life. I hate myself.

I feel similar. It's a perfectly "normal" life... but I'm not happy in it... I can't seem to force myself to be happy.... when did that happen? When did I stop being able to be happy?

Same here.. sums me up perfectly.

Today I fell...uh, I don't even know. Currently I'm scared. I've finally come to the point where I know I need professional help and I think I'm ready to get it. It's just that given my current life situation, that requires telling my boss what's going on so she can help me get help. I'm scared because I'm living in a new country and I'm not sure what their views on mental health are. I don't want to step away from my job to go home to get help, but I fear it may be what I end up having to do.

I feel lonely and pathetic.

Feel like nothing at all. Just want to sleep forever.

Like I've come back down to earth - HARD

TW: self-harm

Feeling a little overwhelmed by emotion today. Would rather be alone where I don't have to talk about it.

I feel so lonely. And like no one understands. But then I feel hyperaware of how dramatic it sounds when I say ..."no one understands."

I've traditionally felt like I do a good job being honest with others about how I feel but I'm starting to feel like others don't respect me, because I'm open about my stuggles. I think my Husband has tuned me out because his brain is more simple than mine and he doesn't believe what I'm going through is real.

hi

this is my first time here.

today and for years now i have been depressed can stop crying and feeling like there is no hope for me

I feel totally alone,my heart hurts and I'm miserable, I feel like a total outcast to the world

My brother just had an anxiety attack and I think I might triggered it, by creating engaging, but too much heated discussion on something trivial. I am waiting for him to calm down and relax for a while, so I can hug him and sincerely apologize. I feel terrible guilty.

He is feeling much better now. We explained honestly our reactions. He was triggered by the memory of being cornered and verbally attacked in school. We hugged. I don't feel as much of guilt as before.

I'm glad that I can talk openly with him. It makes issues so much quicker to resolve and life lighter to bear.

I feel sad and lonely even though I just had a sleep over with my friend.

I'm so fucking sad and tired and lonely and I don't even know what to do... Thank you for having this thread to let me get that out, it's the first time I'm saying this to anyone else. I'm feeling super guilty about being depressed because I can't be happy with my girlfriend and I just want us to have a good time together and I can't pull it together. I think I've been expressing irritated outbursts instead of letting her in because she's already helped me through so much already, and I just don't want to overwhelm her. Tonight, however, she came into my room all dressed with friends, and told me she was going to a party and didn't invite me. I can understand that I've been a buzzkill lately, but it hurt that she didn't even communicate the possibility of her not wanting me to come, which I would have understood and respected. I don't even think it was that. I'm not sure why she didn't invite me. All I know is that I was hurt and started crying when she left and still sent her a text expressing my hope that she'll enjoy herself. This is just tonight, too. I'm just so lonely and don't know who I am anymore. There are so, so many things going on, and I have way too many issues. It's becoming overwhelming. All this and a paper that has to get written somewhere along the way. I don't know what to do.

This started out as a one sentence post and ended up being way longer than expected. Sorry for getting it out here if this wasn't the appropriate spot!

Concerned, do i need antidepressants or to see a professional? Idrk but I'm just taking the highs n the lows day by day

Lonely.

I self harmed today for the first time in 5 months.

I've realized that I will be there for everyone in their darkest moments, but no one will be there for mine.

I remember every one's birthday, but not one person (even family) will remember mine.

So, I guess you could say I'm not feeling too great :)

If I could, I'd give you a beautiful birthday cake with flowers and music and friends....I'd take away your sadness and replace it with laughter. I'm just a stranger across the world...but I understand. Somewhere out their someone knows and shares your pain. I wish for you some relief and some inner strength. There's more to your life than the emptiness you feel. I hope you find it soon friend.

Thank you... Very much, I really appreciate this ❤️❤️

I am the same with birthdays. I always remember everyone's but my family can't remember anyone's. It's not because they don't care it's because they are really bad at remembering haha. Maybe your family is the same?

Maybe :)

In our family there are also certain members who forget birthdays. So when it's our birthday we phone those members and say "Hey, it's my birthday! Did you buy me a present?" or something like that. It's one way to deal with it. But I understand that it must feel awful to not have your love and attention and care reciprocated.

I get where youre coming from. I feel like I give everyone all that I can give but if I were to just leave no one would notice

It really stinks that we all have to feel like this. But I'm trying to get back up and know that one day this will be behind me. I hope the best for you as well :)

The pain is too great.

Empty.

I feel have right now sometimes I feel down so I use Tom and Jerry or Disney channel to make me feel better and I talk to a one on one counselor too so there helping me find coping skills for later use

I feel lonely and sad. I don't feel like anything is going right in my life.

I feel the same

Today I feel absolutely worthless. I've literally only left my room once today and only because I absolutely had to tell my roommate about a timing change for a work thing tomorrow. I really just want to go back to bed and stay there but I can't even sleep.

I feel hopeless. Useless. Confused. Worried. One of my friends has been MIA since Tuesday..and he hasn't responded to any of my texts..and it's scary. I dropped my ex boyfriend and girlfriend from my life.... But knowing me who knows how long it'll last before we talk again and act like nothing ever happened.

i feel like an outsider , like i dont fit in

I feel terrible. I feel like a pile of dirt and everyone treats me like one

Ashamed. Disgusted with myself.

I got drunk last night, got really depressed, and ended up crying in my friend's arms. Later on she took my antidepressant pills away from me when I told her I wanted to take them all. It's the morning now and I feel like no one should have to put up with someone like me. I should do better. I should be better. One day I know my friends are going to walk away because they won't want to put up with me anymore and I won't blame them.

I feel bad today. Feel so sad and lonely.. It's hard to concentrate to things I do..

I feel lost. I don't know what happiness feels like and I'm starting not to feel any sadness. I just feel empty, lost, and tired. I want to cry but I can't anymore. I just want to sleep.