Horrible Surroundings

I am exceptionally depressed about what is going on in the world, and it is exhausting having to keep up. I discovered hundreds of books have been banned where I live, I have discovered people do not support nonprofits, and I have learned terrible things have happened to people.

The responses are so apathetical, and I am tired of living around people like that. I am also tired of having to act like I do not know what is going on as a form of self-preservation. I know what is going on and it is horrendous! The hypocrisy is also overwhelming.

The fact that there are even discussions about some of this stuff is so beyond my comprehension as well. I feel like I am suffocating in the toxic environment of my surroundings, and I know I need to move. Yet, to be frank, that upsets me too, because I am also tired of having to constantly start over.

I also am sick of having to repeat myself. I literally have to repeat myself on an almost daily basis, and it has been that way for almost a decade now. I am tired of being talked down to by people who have less knowledge than me. I am sick of being expected to withhold ridiculous standards which I do not understand and/or even agree with, while simultaneously be talked to as though I am unintelligent and unimportant.