Depression crap
i haven’t feel any happiness recently, what will happen tomorrow? Will everything be okay at school tomorrow? Will i cry infront of them?? Ion know but everything are just a shame. My depression started when i was 10 and now im 14..i never seek for help because how afraid i am, no one understand me i wish thats both of my parents understand me and ask me about my problems but they never ask..im jealous about my friend that their parents understand them, what about me? Am i not important in life? why is it so hard everyday? I woke up every morning thinking everything would be alright but it’s just a fake feeling. I thought when i enter a new school i would have a new life but it’s just the same..it’s kept repeating over and over, i thought my new friends i met last year is my real friends and support me but *** bro?? They actually hate how i act WHY DIDNT THEY TOLD ME SOONER?! I *** HATE SAYING THE SAME SENTENCE TO THEM THAT THE WAYS I ACT IS HOW I SHOW MY HAPPINESS BECAUSE WITH MY FAMILY OR SIBLINGS OR COUSIN I CANT ACT LIKE THAT, WHETERLESS ITS BEEN SUCH A LONG TIME I ACT LIKE THAT..
but uhm that’s it.. i don’t want this thread to be long asf 😭
Hello @Rennish 🙂
I'm truly sorry to hear about the struggles you're facing. It sounds like you're carrying a lot of pain and confusion, and it's understandable to feel overwhelmed. It's hard when you feel like no one understands you, especially at your age when everything can feel so intense and magnified. Remember, your feelings are valid, and it's okay to feel upset about these things.
It's tough to predict exactly what will happen tomorrow at school, but it's important to remember that not every day will be the same. Some days might be harder, but there will also be better days. It's okay if you cry or feel upset; these are natural responses to what you're going through.
You mentioned feeling different at home compared to with friends. It's common to adapt to different environments in different ways, and it doesn't make your feelings any less real or important. The fact that you're aware of these differences shows a lot of self-awareness.
Regarding your friends, communication can sometimes be tricky. People often struggle to express their feelings honestly, especially at your age. It's possible they didn't know how to tell you about their feelings, just as it's hard for you to express yours to them or your family.
It's okay to feel jealous of friends who have understanding parents; that's a natural feeling. Just remember, you are important and your life has immense value, even if it doesn't feel like it right now. It's not easy, but reaching out for help can be a significant step. Maybe consider talking to a teacher, school counselor, or any adult you trust. You don't have to go through this alone.
Lastly, it's okay to keep things short. You're taking a step by expressing yourself here, and that's courageous. Take care of yourself, and know that it's okay to seek help when you're ready.