Competitive mental health

I have clinical depression, general anxiety, panic disorder, and PTSD.

And I know that mental health/illness tends to be competitive it always have been that way for me as well, but I am struggling at the moment and for a while when people bring up their experience (and I never say anything cause of course I know they are trying to be nice) but it makes me feel like I’m not bad enough and I can / need to get worse.

and when people say oh so and so was about to jump off a bridge it was so serious or talk about “serious” mental illness like bipolar makes me feel like they are taking a dig out of me even though I kinda know they aren’t it triggers me stupidly and makes me wanna do something to make people see me.

i have od’ed before but it didn’t work and i didn’t even get sick so i think people don’t take me seriously. Pls help