Depression Daily check in Feb 2-3rd, 2021
Hello my wonderful people. I hope you are all doing well. I just want to say that I'm proud of you for everything. You have come so far and have so much farther to go! You deserve nothing but the best!
This week I want to do something a bit different. I want you to write whatever you are feeling. The good, the bad, the terrible, just anything.
I hope you have an amazing week full for blessings!
@Goldcherry2113 I feel awful....I just got cheated on and I'm so sad.
@calmCranberry4043 Omg... I'm so sorry.
@understandingMelon5013 thank you
@Goldcherry2113 everything is crashing and i feel like nothing can help me...all i want is to be happy again...i have been suffering with depression for 3 yrs and this year will make 4....i just want to smile again and be happy again
Trust me - it can still happen. Depression can linger for a long time, but don't give up hope. I know that it took me until year 4 to start healing and year 5 to admit that it was happening. You are stronger every day because of what you have already faced. @latecia12
@bestVase7265 i just started to admit that i have been suffering from depression an i was able to back track and tell how long i was suffering...
That is a great step. I know it was really hard for me to admit that this was something that I was always going to have. But once I did that then I began to find ways of dealing with it better. It was like lots of small cracks in a wall that I couldn't even see and then the wall started to come down. @latecia12
Hey so I don't really know what I'm doing, I suffer depression and anxiety but I don't really have a job so I don't have money for a therapist or anything. I thought I could use this site to help but if I'm being completely honest I'm too scared to do anything, every time I get depressed and start crying I go here and 50 other places thinking, "okay this is the day I ask for help and get some advice" but then when I'm bout to I get anxiety and I just get too afraid to do anything about it. I don't understand it, I know I'm depressed and I know I need help and this is the best place for help or advice that's free but I back out, and I never know why. I feel like that one scene from that movie Ingrid Goes West, where Aubrey Plaza's character goes, "I know there's something wrong with me, but I don't know how to fix it and I don't know how to change and I don't think I can change." I feel like that's me, like I know there's something wrong with me and I want to change but I don't know how and I always end up crying myself to sleep. I wish I knew why I'm always so depressed, it's not like I have a bad childhood, it was alright, but I was always depressed, even as a kid. I know you shouldn't compare but I mean there are people out there who truly need help and I'm just some guy who doesn't have any real reason, like I was never abused or anything and sometimes I just wonder like, "what gives me the right to feel so sad all the time?" And my friends don't understand they just avoid the whole thing all together because they don't know how to talk to me about it, and I'm not mad at them for it, it is what it is. Before anyone says you can't compare your mental health to others I know that but sometimes my mind just goes there you know? Like sometimes my mind starts thinking things that I know aren't true- I know my friends love me, I know they care about me, I know they would never do anything to hurt me and then sometimes my mind starts getting distracted, by negative thoughts; "they don't care about you" "they aren't really your friends they're just lying to make you feel better" "No one actually likes you, that's why you're always so alone" "You're just a burden to everyone stop bothering everyone." Like I said I don't really know what I'm doing, even writing this post I'm not sure what I'm doing but I figure it's better than spending another night crying myself to sleep at midnight.
First of all, it is okay. You took a great step in coming here. Realizing that you want to find a path to healing is awesome.
Depression is also really, really normal, but at the same time it is really, really horrible. You don't have to have suffered any real trauma to experience it because it is tied to your brain chemicals.
Recovery takes lots of time and effort, but this is a good place to start. You can post here as often as you want. This particular part of the site is a little slower in responding, but I usually put something in a day or two and I always respond back when you have started a thread.
This takes lots of bravery. You are doing the right thing in reaching out.@Katsuki1Dynamite1
@Goldcherry2113 i have no energy to walk to exercise to deal with my mother and the two faced society of this high school i hate my very existence i hate everyone everything i see nothing but gray i hear nothing but my music loud blasting blaring in my eardrums
Sending peace. Many of us have been in your shoes. @TheAloneAndAfraid
Not good at all...
Did you want to tell us more?@Snow8469
I'm new to this group, but I have been really struggling lately. I have been so anxious and constantly feeling like I don't matter in this world and that no one actually cares about me. I know that sounds irrational but I can't escape this feeling that my friends hate me and would rather me leave them alone. I have a hard time with rejection sensitivity because I have severe ADHD, so when people cancel on plans with me or say they can't hang out, I immediately feel as though I did something wrong or that they hate me. It's a horrible feeling and I'm so tired of doubting every friendship that I have.
It is easy to doubt all of those friendships when you have lots of self-doubt. It may be irrational, but it doesn't make it less painful or less real. Lots of us have been there. Sending peace and strength. Feel free to share and vent any time. It can really help. @haley8799
