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Over 40 with no career🥺

I feel like life is already over💔

5
User Profile: BlueDarkAurora
BlueDarkAurora 1 day ago

@WorthlessBeing43 I can understand why it feels that way but it's not over. Life can be a new start at any age and the only one who gets to truly decide that is you.

I hope you find people, things, hobbies and moments that make you feel like you're on a new journey, one that's full of hopes and so many dreams that make you want to take inspired action everyday.

User Profile: jacek73
jacek73 10 hours ago

@WorthlessBeing43

Hey. I've read your previous post, too...

Imagine a few men still living with their moms: One of them left the studies and never had a job, diagnosed with multiple health issues, taking a fistful of pills a day. Another, capable of working, but drinking alcohol, chain-smoking and playing video games, and not taking part in daily chores. And the third one, educated, but alone, hard working and going to a gym regularly. The same but different...

What I wanted to say life is never "0" or "1", but mostly different shades of grey.

I know from my experience this is EXTREMELY difficult to think about it as temporary and take it as the "time for yourself" when you are out of job. But maybe it's an opportunity for self-care and some progress?

Graduating does not automatically make you a successful person. I know many examples of people with a degree (including me, one of the best students in a year, among 180) who are doing quite simple and "cheap" jobs.

As far as I understand finding a new job is now a priority for you?

Graduating takes lots of time and money, but have you considered any professional courses, that could make you more up-to-date with the changes on the job market?

Living in the house of your parents can be a limitation, but have you thought about some things that can make you feel more independent? Like redecorating your room in your personal style, doing some grocery shopping for yourself or washing your clothes yourself?

Having children requires meeting someone... What activities you took could make you feel closer to that moment in your life?

3 replies
User Profile: WorthlessBeing43
WorthlessBeing43 OP 9 hours ago

I complete my own chores like washing, cleaning, cooking, shopping etc. I have met someone. We have been married for a year and a half, but at our age and with me now out of work, having children is not possible.

2 replies
User Profile: jacek73
jacek73 8 hours ago

@WorthlessBeing43


Thank you for additional information. Certainly it makes the picture more complete.

So, you have been married, but living at your parents' place (if I understand it clearly)? I assume while you are 43, they must be around 60? How is their mental health ? Do they need being looked after, or still capable of supporting you with raising kids, if necessary?

I am sorry, but in your postings there is a note like your unemployment was not anything temporary, but going to be a permanent state. What makes you think like that?

You are right, having kids must be easier in a situation when at least one of the parents is working, while the other one take care of them. Is your wife working professionally?

It sounds like you are suffering from some mid-life crisis, reassessing your goals and possibilities to reach them. But maybe the things are not as dark as they seem to be?
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