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can’t deal with myself

User Profile: ExhaustedPigeon055
ExhaustedPigeon055 October 31st, 2020

I'm so sick of not being able to handle worrying about what people think of me and what they're doing. I can't control it at all. Coming off of a breakup is hard enough, but even after three months I'm not over him. I can't stop texting him and freaking out over the littlest things he does. It's stupid. What can i do to get over myself and let him go, but keep him in my life as my friend?

i want to block myself from texting people and seeing their texts but i don't want to block them. What do i do?

2
User Profile: InquireWithin
InquireWithin November 1st, 2020

@ExhaustedPigeon055

When there is something I want to let go of, or a habit I want to break (such as the worries you describe), I try to visualize a shining cord or rope between me and each person I am in conflict with. Or people I want to set limits or boundaries with. Then I imagine the cord is breaking like a tight piece of twine, unraveling and fraying and snapping. When it snaps apart, the connection between us is cut, and I go free. Then I resolve to move forward in life with a better boundary between me and the person. Sometimes I will visualize a shiny scissors cutting this energetic cord that keeps me wanting to engage with the other person, or wanting to stay connected when I know the connection is not good for me.

I have other suggestions, but will stop here. I hope this gives you some ideas, something to start with.

User Profile: kindMelon4118
kindMelon4118 November 1st, 2020

@ExhaustedPigeon055

Breakups are hard! Sometimes, people need some time of no contact before they can transition to a friendship. If you feel you need some time, it's okay to tell him that you want to be friends in the long run and you think it would be healthy if the two of you had a period of no contact while you move forward in your lives.