backhanded insights

@doublelife those are great ways to word things! More likely than not, people won't get offended since you're not directly saying that statement to them about them. It's very important to say "sometimes people" instead of "you" because saying "you" can often feel like a blame word. I think you're doing just fine and it's great you're focused on not hurting anyone! :-)

@LotusFlower92 Thanks :)

@doublelife that's good a good strategy. I need to make note of that. A former counselor of mine once advised to avoid placing blame on the others when there's a disagreement. Like using 'I' statements instead of 'you' and 'your' etc. but even then, even in those particular situations, I don't want the conversation to seem like it's all about me. There are times in casual conversation when I draw a blank on what questions to ask them and I don't want to talk about myself so I end up just not saying anything at all and even then I worry about that being rude.

@Wordwrecker I feel ya. I have a short attention span & a hard time coming up w/ convo fast enough that ppl don't think I have nothing to say to them. Sometimes I get these bouts of inspiration. Other times I'm blank. It doesn't mean I'm not interested. It often means my mind's engrossed in something else eg if someone interrupts me or I'm thinking through things. I find sometimes talkings through helps me figure things out eg brainstorming for projects but for emotional stuff I think so differently it's usually best if I only tell people what I come up w/ after I think it through. I feel embarrased about how long I take to think the most basic things though sometimes. I don't have much experience around ppl who treat me right. It's been a lot better since I finished college & started working full-time. It's just kinda rough navigating adult situations when my guidebook is only relevant around immature petty college kids. I know sometimes when I say something rather than nothing & it's not the right thing people latch onto it & we end up having a long convo about something that came out wrong anyway. I prefer texting over f2f for deep stuff because it gives me more time to think w/o them seeing all my reactions while I'm figuring it out. I stare off into space a lot & sometimes ppl think I'm not ok

That sounds like a polite way of phrasing it to me. Just the fact you asked that... shows you're a thoughtful person. As long as you're being genuine, it's unlikely ppl will take it the wrong way

@ChromeLotus Thanks. That means a lot :)