Social anxiety and driving
Hi everybody.
I suffer from social anxiety and even though it was very difficult for me, I went through the process of getting my driving license recently. Driving in the presence of other people triggers my anxiety (and the road is full of people driving other cars) and I can't seem to get rid of that nervousness before I take the car.
As soon as I know I have to drive, I get the feeling that I'm not good enough at driving and I'm afraid of making mistakes (being judged, I guess) and hurting myself or other people by not driving properly. Also, because I know I feel insecure before driving, I get to think that driving isn't a good idea because it's not safe to drive insecure (I feel bad for feeling bad?). But, at the same time, when I drive, after driving for a while, the feelings disappear, I don't think I'm a bad driver anymore and I actually have fun. Then it all starts again the next time I need to take the car.
Learning to drive was a hell because of my anxiety. Thethought that it would get better and I would end up knowing how to drive by practicing and confronting that situation kept me from quitting. And I thought that all of the anxiety would be completelygone after gettingmy license but, even though it is not as bad as it was when I was learning, I still get anxious
Does it happen to any of you? Do you have any ideas of how to overcome this?
I'm currently in the process of getting my license and it's awful with social anxiety. I get really paranoid that the other drivers are looking at me through all the windows in the car and judging me if I don't drive as well as everyone else. I also get that fear that I'll crash and accidently hurt someone. I grip the steering wheel so hard my hands start to cramp. I'm so worried about taking the test with the person in the car that I'm thinking about just not taking it all. I mean there's always walking and biking, right?
Oh man, I totally get this. I have my license and I have my own car, I also have social anxiety and driving anxiety. Both are so bad that if I'm stretched too thin I will break down and cry and shut out everyone. With driving, that anxiety will go away over time. It will be a while but it will go away. Things that help me calm down when I'm driving are listening to music that makes me feel good and having a safety blanket. My safety blanket is my GPS. Even if I don't need it, I make sure it's set up. I'm afraid of getting lost and not knowing where I'm going. With social anxiety, I purposefully put myself in uncomfortable situations so that I can adjust. If I find it to be too hard, I go to a quiet place. I also make sure there are people I know and are comfortable with. These anxieties will get better over time, you just have to keep fighting!
To girl3132,
When I was younger learning to drive was a challenge. I have shared some of those anxious thoughts or worries such as "others are driving better than you." There are many things you can do to ease the anxiety. What worked best for me that may also help you includes the following:
Practice driving even if you are not driving practices keeping your eyes on the road checking Your mirrors keeping your muscles relaxed etc
Deep breathing, especially at stoplights if you notice you are anxious breathe
Elimate distractions in the car. If you are anxious turn off the radio or try listening to calmer music or classical
Prepare ahead. Make sure you havea map and GPS in your car.
Pull over. If you are in a situation where your anxiety gets really high while driving find a SAFE place to pull over for a few minutes until you are calm.
You are likely to be a much better driver than you think. Use stop thought skills for judgements. Many people are too busy thinking about where they need to be next anyway.
You can do it! Keep working at it and with time it will get better:)
Thanks for answering. It's great to know that things will get better. Thanks a lot for your recommendations too. I'll try my best :)
I am so glad that you posted this, @girl3132. I have been dealing with intense driving anxiety myself which makes it hard for me to drive for more than 15 minute trips. Even though I am very aware of the anxiety I feel when getting behind the wheel and the fear associated with making a mistake, I had never really thought of it as a social anxiety issue before. Now that I think about it, a lot of it does stem from worrying about others judging me for an error (even if it is minor) or critiquing me for my skills.
I think, for me, I just need to keep practicing and going a little further outside my comfort zone each time to get more confident behind the wheel. Although I prefer driving when there are few cars on the road, I know that is not always going to be an option so I just have to keep trying to branch out and not let the anxiety win! Everyone who has posted has given really great tips, so thank you to all of you also! I am definitely going to implement those, especially keeping a charged GPS with me for an extra sense of security. Thanks again for the post and all of the suggestions. You all are so wonderful! :)
It may also be helpful to work through the Anxiety Self Help Guide found on the menu at the top right hand corneron the 7cupsoftea website. There's a lot of helpful info on anxiety and coping. Manystrategies from the guide canbe applied while driving or in social situations:).
ya i've been really anxious about driving. i'm so afraid of getting in an accident
I kind of laughed at my last therapy session because I had to drive during a winter advisory alert. The roads were bad. There was ice and sleet and I kinda needed new windshields opera. I missed my exit. And tried a diff rote. I had to pull for a sec to visualize my next move and then I was fine. Lol I realized that I remembered what was posted in this forum and stayed calm instead of thinking I was lost. I was so proud:).
Oops I meant I had to pull over.... Sorry everyone, theres a few typos in that message.
Oh jeez, my anxiety was so terrible when I began learning how to drive. I always thought everyone was staring at me or judging me, hated driving more than 20 minutes, and was absolutely terrified of getting into an accident. Honestly, the way I managed to (mostly) get over the driving anxiety was to just throw myself into it and keep practicing. Just take some drives and keep going a little more out of your comfort zone, and remember that everyone else is too preoccupied with themselves to judge you :)
@girl3132 I gave my test a miss because I was so nervous of someone watching me drive. I know I'll do it eventually but I wasted money because of missing it. I can't wait to just get it over with and have my license, although I feel I'll fail first time. You're so lucky you already have your license, I'm jealous.