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Need friendship advice everything has gone wrong

drinkmythoughts July 16th, 2017
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If you can't be bothered to read all of this, essentially a group of my friends all despise me even though i didn't do anything wrong, and it's stressing me out so much. When we were arguing on whatsapp I didn't stop shaking for 2 hours (we have already broken up for summer holidays). This might sound overdramatic for what happened but I think i have anxiety because everything is stressing me out so much, and it doesn't help that i was feeling suicidal just a month ago, and my brain keeps telling me to kill myself as revenge.

This is the whole story because i need to rant, it's quite silly and petty but i never wanted this to happen i just wanted to do the right thing.

Me and 4 other school friends took part in a national competition this past week. We chose to do it and chose to go as a team because it's about astrophysics and ciphers and looked quite interesting, and we are all in the same computing class. Unfortunately, my team did not pull their weight, maybe because they were unmotivated because we are on summer holiday. The competition worked by people submitting either a scientific analylis of the challenge, or a media submission, which is like writing songs or articles or drawing to do with the challenge, and then you get a certain amount of points. I did the maths and over the week, i earned the team 80% of our total points, and another girl earned 20%. The other 3 people didn't do anything at all. I admit i got a bit annoyed at them during the week and i snapped at them but i think that is justified considering they chose to participate in the challenge but didnt even bother to reply to my messages asking for help. you have no idea how hard it was to do all that work by myself, i was staying up at night and i cancelled plans with friends and i have loads of schoolwork to do that i put aside to do this.

I then asked my friend from outside school to help me out (i don't think it's really cheating, because most teams are still in school and had their teachers to help them). He wrote a really good song about time travel and global warming, he's so talented bless him. We then made a video for it together and that entry got the highest amount of points out of all of them. He also sang a song that i wrote for me because i can't sing, and that also got a lot of points. These 2 submissions got us about half of our overall points. Didnt even get a thank you from my team even though we spent the whole day doing them, when i couldve properly hung out with my friend who i hadnt seen in 6 months

We have now come 3rd place in the competition in the media section, which I am happy about but only 1st and 2nd place get prizes unfortunately. However, they give 25 prizes to the team for an entry that they really liked, so it must be either the song my friend wrote or the one I wrote. Either way its solely due to me and my friend that we got that prize because a) the prize was literally for one of the songs, not for 3rd place or anything, and b) 3/5 of my team did nothing at all, and the other girl only did 20%.

However they are all demanding that we split the prize between us evenly which is making me really upset, because I have devoted so much time to this competition whereas they have done nothing, so its only fair that me and my friend split the prize between us and give some to the other girl. Do you not think its silly to give each of us 5, what are we going to do with that, and they didnt earn it. When I tried to explain it to them, it was very difficult because it was 3 people all attacking me (they still havent thanked me for my contribution). My original idea was to give the full 25 to my friend, because to be honest it would only really have value as the full prize, and he was the one who wrote the song that let us get the prize. Ive changed my mind and split it proportional to the points we got because apparently it was too radical for them ( 20 for me and friend, 5 for other girl).

They still dont like it, and the 3 people that didnt do anything are acting like they have some moral high ground because they are saying that we should donate the money to charity (seriously)

It got worse, because they are in a groupchat with one of my other friends, and they were all b*tching about me and my friend sent me screenshots (bless her)

Here are some things they said
she is acting like she did everything when she didnt - i never said i did everything, i said i basically did everything which is true because i did 80%
(when I told them that I did the competition instead of seeing a friend because I cared about it and wanted to win) what the **** she did this instead of hanging out with her friends lmao who the **** does that
and possibly the funniest one I am really extremely disliking her right now, i only use hate for people like isis - nice to know im slightly less bad than isis for winning a prize in an astrophysics competition (ive never liked her shes homophobic as well)
this one girl keeping sending long messages about how she deserves some of the prize and its really funny, because shes been on holiday all week and didnt do anything at all

Just to remind you, these people are my friends I made a few passive aggressive comments but everything I said was true and fair, but they are being so horrible over such a small thing, this one girl is replying to everything I say with a snarky comment. this is all making me so upset, so last night i told them to keep all the money because i dont want it. i do want it because i earned it but im so tired of arguing, and i feel like they might donate it to charity, and then this entire week has just been a waste of time because i didnt even get the prize i earned.

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veronirbs July 17th, 2017
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@drinkmythoughts it can be annoying when you do so much work but you have proven yourself as dedicated and hard-working and that should be validation for you. The prize money is less important than friendship so if you still want to be friends just explain how you felt and apologise to them if they felt you were bashing them. Maybe this will allow them to understand in some way. The whole thing will blow over soon so don't worry too much about it. Next time you're in a frpup try to allocate who does what and only do your portion of the work nothing more.

I hope all is resolved for you.

veronirbs July 17th, 2017
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@veronirbs group *

drinkmythoughts OP July 26th, 2017
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@veronirbs thank you for replying, i think ive gotten over it but im still a bit upset at the stuff they said behind my back so im not really interested in being friends with them anymore and they are not replying to my messages anyway so i guess ill just wait till september :/

karosorakaros August 17th, 2017
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@drinkmythoughts

I think those people took advantage of you and I would feel the same way. I don't know if you watch Game of Thrones, but you remind me of Ned Stark because he plays by the rules with honor even though everyone around him is corrupt. And Ned is the man. Some people are cursed with an actual conscience. I hope this coming semester is better for you.